Jan 5, 2025

10 tips for parents to avoid losing their cool with kids

Teesha Shirodkar

​Are you losing your cool?

Parenting can be a delightful journey, but let’s face it, there are moments that test even the calmest of parents. It’s easy to feel overwhelmed when kids are bouncing off the walls or refusing to listen. Here are some simple tips to help you stay calm and composed.

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​Act as if you are being watched

Imagine someone is observing your parenting. This awareness can help you not to cross your boundaries and remain calm. When feeling frustrated, remind yourself that your reactions are being noted, prompting a more measured response.

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​Speak softly, not loudly

Use a calm and quiet tone instead of yelling. This approach often gets you more respect and attention from children. Instead of shouting at your child for misbehaving, gently say, “Let’s talk about this calmly.”

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​Avoid back-and-forth arguments

Steer clear of back-and-forth arguments that escalate tensions. Example, instead of engaging in an argument over chores, calmly state what you expect from your child and consequences of it without getting drawn into an argument.

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Take a time-out when you see things getting bad

If emotions run high, step into another room for a few moments. This brief time-out allows you to collect your thoughts before addressing the situation. If your child is throwing a tantrum, excuse yourself to breathe deeply and return with a clearer mind.

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Use stress relief tools like stress ball and meditation

Squeeze a stress ball when feeling overwhelmed, it can help release tension effectively. For instance, during moments of frustration while helping with homework, take a moment to squeeze the ball before responding.

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​Start your sentence with positivity

Frame your sentence positively to create a sense of understanding and connection. For example, say, “I love how helpful you usually are, it hurt my feelings when you didn’t listen just now.” This approach will encourage better behaviour without damaging child’s self-esteem.

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​Think about the long-term consequences

Consider how your actions today will impact your child’s feelings in the future. If you react harshly now, they may remember it negatively later on. Instead of yelling during a stressful moment, reflect on how you want them to remember your parenting style.

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Take some rest, because even parents need it!

Ensure you get adequate sleep, tired parents are more prone to irritability. Just as children can become cranky when fatigued, adults are not immune to the effects of exhaustion. Plan family activities during times when everyone is well-rested and in a fresh mood.

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​Make sure you are always kind

Always choose kindness over frustration, children usually remember how they felt rather than specific events. Kids likely won’t remember the day you forgot to pack their lunch or the time they misplaced their favourite toy. However, they will remember your reaction, and they will learn to react the same way.

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​Implement a talking stick

Use an object like a stick to take turns while talking during disagreements. When one person holds the stick, they have the floor to speak without interruption. This method encourages listening and understanding each other’s perspectives.

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Thanks For Reading!

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