Matt McKenna: Buckle, Buckle the Mountain Man, Santa Claus, Cap'n Monty, Alan J. Pakula, Barista, Cap'n Monty as the Tour Guide, Central Virginia State Mascot, Coach Andrews, Coach Patterson, Confused Party Guy, Derek, Donnie's Dad, Drill Sergeant, Fat Guy, Future Hayley's Husband, Ghoul, Guy, Guy In Line, Guy at the Concert, Henry Calloway, Homeless Guy #3, Janitor, Jesus H. Christ, Kevin, Leader, Man, Mr. Stashwick, Russian, Softball player #1, Waiter