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Writing Guide For Student Report Cards: Office of Learning and Teaching August 2006

This document provides guidance for writing clear, concise, and informative student report cards. It recommends using simple language free of educational jargon, focusing comments on key achievements and areas for improvement, and basing comments on evidence from student assessments. Sample reports are included to demonstrate effective comment writing. The goal is to help teachers provide parents with meaningful information about their child's progress.

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0% found this document useful (0 votes)
96 views25 pages

Writing Guide For Student Report Cards: Office of Learning and Teaching August 2006

This document provides guidance for writing clear, concise, and informative student report cards. It recommends using simple language free of educational jargon, focusing comments on key achievements and areas for improvement, and basing comments on evidence from student assessments. Sample reports are included to demonstrate effective comment writing. The goal is to help teachers provide parents with meaningful information about their child's progress.

Uploaded by

briannamuham1249
Copyright
© © All Rights Reserved
We take content rights seriously. If you suspect this is your content, claim it here.
Available Formats
Download as DOC, PDF, TXT or read online on Scribd

www.education.vic.gov.

au/studentlearning/studentreports/

Department of Education

Writing Guide
for
Student Report Cards

Office of Learning and Teaching


August 2006

Last updated: 22.02.07

www.education.vic.gov.au/studentlearning/studentreports/

Department of Education

CONTENTS
Introduction

Section 1: The need to be clear, concise, comprehensive and consistent

1.1

Useful tips

1.1.1
1.1.2
1.1.3
1.1.4
1.1.5
1.1.6
1.1.7

5
5
5
6
6
6
6

Make comments easy to understand


Avoid unnecessary information
Do not use of specialist terms
Avoid very detailed curriculum descriptions
Avoid comments which refer only to task completion
Use Evidence
Focus on key aspects

Section 2: Writing comments for each section of the report


2.1
2.2
2.3
2.4
2.5

The achievement section


The areas for improvement section
The school support section
The home assistance to help the students progress section
The Student comment and My learning goals sections

Section 3: Commentary on three completed reports


3.1
3.2
3.3

8
10
11
12
13
14

Alexanders Report
Anna's Report
Johns Report

14
16
18

Section 4: Writing checklist

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Introduction
Student report cards were introduced to provide parents with clearer and more consistent
information about their students progress against state-wide standards.
This resource is designed to help teachers write comments for the new student report cards
that are concise, clear and comprehensive. It includes:
advice on how to write comments that are clear and succinct
advice on what to avoid in writing comments
examples of good practice in writing comments, with an emphasis on providing rich,
relevant, valid and honest information
commentary on some completed reports

Last updated: 22.02.07

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Department of Education

Section I
The need to be clear, concise, comprehensive and consistent
The report card is a concise, commonsense report of student progress and achievement that
all parents can easily understand. It describes what students have achieved against the
Victorian Essential Learning Standards (VELS). It also informs parents of the areas in which
their child needs to improve and states what the school will do and provides suggestions for
what parents can do at home with their child.
The report is not intended to educate parents in the language of the Victorian Essential
Learning Standards (VELS) or any other educational framework. Jargon and specialist
educational terms should be avoided. Nor should it contain detailed curriculum statements or
descriptions of programs of study. Parents and students should be able to identify areas
where they can focus their attention and aim for improvement.
Written comments should be consistent with the judgements made and the corresponding A
to E ratings. Recommendations for improvement need to be consistent. Comments about
student achievement should also be provided.
The challenge for teachers is to provide all the relevant detail about students progress and
ensure that the information on the report is clear and concise. It is important the report is
coherent and there are logical links between the achievement of the student, areas for
improvement and actions the school and parents might take.
It is also essential reports provide assessment information that is accurate and based on
evidence from teachers assessment records about judgements made against the VELS.

Key information in the report cards


Student reports should provide the following key information:
1. Clear information on what the student has achieved
This section of the report focuses on each students progress on the basis of assessment
evidence gathered by the teacher over a semester.
2. Suggestions for areas of improvement that the student should work on next
This section of the report focuses on future learning to be addressed in the following
reporting period.
3. Information on how the school will help the student to improve
This section of the report makes recommendations for actions to be taken by the school to
help the students future learning.
4. Suggestions on how parents can help the student to improve
This section of the report suggests specific ways in which parents can support the student,
taking account of the areas for improvement or future learning.

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Department of Education

1.1 Useful tips


1.1.1 Make comments easy to understand
Two connected ideas per sentence is an effective way of using the space available in the
student report. The two ideas should be closely related and the first idea may introduce a
topic, while the second may add detail to illustrate the quality of a students work. For
example:

Johns oral report on families was informative (first idea), with several humorous
anecdotes he had collected from elderly neighbours (second idea).

Alternatively, the second idea may provide a comparison between possible approaches to
completing work. For example:

Kate needs to use the internet more widely when researching (first idea)
rather than relying on one or two sources for her assignments (second idea).
The second idea may also describe an associated kind of behaviour you wish to comment on,
such as:
She shared information with the team (first idea), and worked cooperatively to
complete tasks on time (second idea)..
Generally sentences should be short and no longer than 25 words.
1.1.2 Avoid unnecessary information
Evaluate the aspects of the students achievement and improvements required in order to
select the most important matters for the report. Avoid crowding the report with less
important details and being too detailed.
Delete redundant words and sentences that do not change the meaning. For example a range
of different ideas says no more than a range of ideas.
Ensure the content of each section relates exclusively to that section. Some matters may be
best reported in a different section. The content of the report should describe coherent links
between the areas of achievement, the way forward, and the schools and the parents roles
in supporting this improvement.
Avoid unnecessary or repetitious expressions. Padding adds no helpful information and
takes up valuable space.
Less important information may be deferred to an interview or a conversation with the
parent.
1.1.3 Do not use of specialist terms
The report card should present information in clear, jargon-free language. For example,
higher order thinking represents a meaningful concept to teachers but not to most parents.
Word choice should reflect community understanding, not professional terminology. For
example, He has appropriately completed all of the nominated tasks really means He has
completed all the expected work.

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Department of Education

1.1.4 Avoid detailed curriculum descriptions


Do not include detailed curriculum statements or lists of all the topics, learning activities and
assignments covered. Parents are more interested in how their child is progressing towards
expected levels of achievement and where they need to improve.
1.1.5 Avoid comments which refer only to task completion
Avoid comments that only refere to task completion and do not provide an evaluation. For
example do not write comment such as:

Natalie has completed the course requirements


There is no evaluation here and no indication of how well she has done.
Justin has read the required four wide reading texts.
This is unhelpful unless it represents evidence of a real achievement for Justin,
perhaps identified in an earlier report as a goal. Consider if the four texts were
suitably demanding for his stage of learning and where or not he produced any kinds
of responses to them?
Tom enjoys using the computer for his presentations and has successfully completed
a number of PowerPoint presentations this year.
This comment refers to enjoyment and task completion rather than learning
achievement. Some kind of evaluation of Toms achievement relative to the standards
is needed.

Parents want to know what was learnt and how well, where improvement is needed and what
should be done next.
1.1.6 Use evidence
Reports of judgements made about student achievement must be based on quality evidence
of what each student has actually achieved against the standards. The evidence that sits
behind the overall judgement and the scores and rating assigned provides the detail for the
written comments about specific:
areas of strength and specific areas for improvement
ways to help the student continue to learn and develop future pathways
ways for parents to assist the students learning.
1.1.7 Focusing on key aspects
Below is a primary report card demonstrating the importance of ensuring an appropriate (but
not necessarily comprehensive) coverage of the domains in the various sections of the report
card.
It is not always possible to include comments on all domains in every report, so it is
important to identify aspects of achievement that are the most important.

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Department of Education

John Davidson
Year 4 Semester 2
Learning Area

Rating

Health and Physical Education

Interpersonal Development

Personal Learning

Civics and Citizenship

The Arts

English Reading

English Writing

English Speaking and listening

The Humanities

Mathematics

Number

Space

Measurement,
chance and data

Structure

Working
mathematically

Science

Design, Creativity and


Technology
Information and Communications
Technology

Thinking Processes

Year 2

Year 3

Year 4

Year 5

Year 6

In the English domain for example, the student is achieving very well in Reading, and
Speaking and Listening, but not in Writing. Because of the close relationship among all three
dimensions of English, especially at Primary level, the lower level of achievement in Writing
probably deserves attention in the report.
It may be possible to note some general advice for improvement if patterns in the students
behaviour are affecting different domains. For example, does the student need to plan his
writing and his artwork? Does he need to spend more time on all learning tasks? Is some
aspect of his writing achievement common to the cause of similar achievement in Thinking
Processes? Can his excellent achievement in ICT be helpful in assisting his improvement in
areas of lower achievement in any way?

Last updated: 22.02.07

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Department of Education

Section 2
Writing comments for each section of the report
2.1

The achievement section (What the student has achieved)

Comments in this section should focus specifically on achievement against the standards. It
is important to avoid comments related to completion rates, program activities, effort or
other matters unrelated to achievement. Avoid stating in the Achievement section what has
not been achieved instead, put this in Areas for Improvement.
The comments must align with the judgements made at the dimension level as reflected in
the domain rating on the graphic.
The following examples illustrate ways of making comments more succinct and focussed on
the individual students achievement. Further elaboration of the comments may be dealt with
during interviews or conversations with parents or students.
Original

Suggestion

Notes

Students were involved


in designing, drawing
and constructing 2D
and 3D shapes.

Jane effectively
designed, drew 2D and
began to construct 3D
shapes.

Ensure the report relates to


student achievement not to
learning programs, or move
to Areas for future learning:
Janes work with 2D
and 3D shapes shows
that she needs

Thoms timeline
project on the history
of the Earth was well
presented. His
diagrams and symbols
were accurate.

Thoms timeline
project on the history
of the Earth included
clear and accurate
diagrams and symbols.

Evidence to support reports


of achievement is integrated
into a succinct summary.

Lee has read four


novels and completed
three pieces of writing
this semester.

Lees reports on four


novels shows improved
understanding of
stories.

Completion rates alone are


seldom indicative of
achievement.

Students were involved


in a variety of learning
experiences in
Number, including
graphical
representation of data.

Kim accurately adds


and subtracts two-digit
numbers and has
begun to use bar
graphs to represent
collected data.

Focus on specific evidence


for individual student, or
move to Areas for future
learning:
Kim needs to improve
how he presents
numbers in graphs.

Kate has demonstrated

Kate can find explicit

Translate professional

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a range of strategies to information when


make meaning.
reading difficult texts.

vocabulary or terminology.
Avoid vague expressions
such as a range of, and use
specific examples instead.

Elizabeth has achieved


a sound understanding
of the particle model
and is able to use this
knowledge to explain
the structure and
properties of different
types of matter.

Elizabeth understands
the particle model and
can explain the
structure and
properties of different
types of matter.

Ensure unnecessary words


are removed.

Alan has welldeveloped


interpersonal skills and
is able to work
effectively with others
to compete group
tasks.

Alan works well in


groups and can explain
the benefits of working
in a team.

Specific aspects of
achievement that align with
the VELS are identified but
are written in plain English.

Tim reads and


interprets maps of
different kinds and at
different scales,
including street
directories and school
atlas maps.

Tim reads and


understands simple
maps such as street
directories and atlases.

Clear, evidence-based
description of achievement
will provide a pathway for
improvement by including
more challenging maps e.g.
ordnance survey, topographic
maps etc.

Sample comment prompts for the achievement section:


Sample comment prompts are sometimes helpful in focusing attention on the relevant
section of the report, in this instance, achievement. The comment prompts below are for
English and Mathematics, but they give you some idea of how they could be constructed for
other domains.
The student:
speaks confidently
asks questions
answers questions
gives relevant information when responding to questions
reads fiction and factual texts
reads fluently
is developing confidence
discusses ideas presented by authors
selects key ideas, distinguishes between fact and opinion
can retell a story in sequence..
plans and writes for a variety of purposes such as
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can measure time and length


is able to use numbers up to millions and decimals to hundredths
can estimate by rounding to the nearest 1000.

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2.2

Department of Education

The areas for improvement section (Areas for improvement


or future learning)

Information included in the areas for improvement section provides a clear picture of
important next steps for the student. This advice should be manageable and realistic.
Avoid long lists of areas for improvement or for future learning. If too much is listed,
students and their parents will find it hard to know where to focus attention. Instead, focus
on what is critical.
The following examples illustrate ways of focusing comments relating to areas for
improvement easier to understand and more focused.
Original

Suggestion

Notes

Kate had difficulty in


understanding
scientific ideas
expressed in some
journal articles. It
took her a long time
to read and she had
difficulty in
determining main
ideas.

Kate needs to begin her


research with simple
journal articles. She
should use a key word
list. She needs to
practise skimming for
information.

Focus the report on direct,


practical strategies for
improvement. It is
unnecessary to describe the
difficulty in detail.

I would also
recommend that
Jackie use her class
time more effectively.
Whilst she is quick to
redress her attention
and focus in class
when requested to do
so, I would like to see
Jackie develop a more
independent
approach of her own.

Jackie should keep


working in class without
being told to do so, and
become a more
independent learner.

Ensure the advice is


sufficiently specific to
provide guidance for the
student.

You should consider


being involved in
more extra-curricular
activities to further
enhance your
education.

Paul should take part in


more extra-curricular
activities.

Focus on the individual


student.
Avoid unnecessary terms such
as to further enhance
your education.

He sometimes needs
to seek clarification
and further
information before
proceeding with a

Before starting a task


Jack should ask for help
about exactly what is
required, especially for
complex tasks with

Ensure the language used


provides support for the
student to develop personal
goals and a pathway for
improvement.

Avoid unnecessary terms,


such as redress her
attention and I would
like to see.
The advice could also be
appropriate for more general
improvement.

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task. This is
particularly important
for him in task
analysis activities
where multiple
processes are
required or when only
the essential
information needs to
be extracted in order
to complete the task.

several steps.

Van should apply the


proof-reading and redrafting process
consistently.

Van should proof-read


and re-draft his writing.

Aim for the greatest


simplicity of language.

after finishing the


first draft, Fergus
needs to spend time
embellishing his work.

after finishing the


first draft, Fergus
should focus on adding
new ideas, and using a
wider vocabulary.

Provide clear and specific


advice: embellishing needs
clarification; state what
Fergus should focus on in his
re-drafts: new ideas,
improving vocabulary, or
adding illustrations.

Sample comment prompts for the areas for improvement section


The sample comment prompts below are mainly for English and Mathematics, but they give
you some idea of how they could be constructed for other domains.
The student needs to:
plan their writing using key words or drawings and maps
read their writing and make changes
plan and edit written pieces
check calculations
develop confidence to express their ideas and opinions
work cooperatively in teams
keep going with a task that is not solved successfully the first time
practise following instructions
listen more attentively during class discussions and not be distracted by those around
them
vary their sentence beginnings.

2.3

The school support section (The school will do the following


to support the student in his or her learning)

Information included in the school support section is designed to provide a realistic picture
to the student and the parents of plans the school has for helping the student. It is important

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that this section has a clear link to the areas for improvement section and that it avoids
specifying outcomes of these plans.
The following examples illustrate ways of focusing comments relating to the school support
section easier to understand and more focused.
Original
I encourage her to
seek assistance,
when in doubt of the
expectations of a
task, in order to avoid
confusion.

Suggestion

Comments

I will encourage her to


Clearer and more accessible
ask for help when she is language.
unsure about the task.

We encourage her to
We will use a work
develop her
diary to help her to
organisational skills in hand in work on time.
order to ensure that
her work is completed
and submitted when
due.

Clearer and more accessible


language and a practical and
manageable strategy.

Kate needs to use the


internet more widely
when researching
rather than relying on
one or two reference
books for her
assignments.

Kate will be given two


key websites for her
research. She will use a
simple data chart to
record information.

Focus on strategy rather than


area for improvement.

Steve needs to
improve the range of
sentence structures
he uses.

Steve will use stories


with a range of
sentence types as
models in his writing.

Focus on strategy rather than


area for improvement.

Sample comment prompts for the school support section


The sample comment prompts below are for English and Mathematics, but they give you
some idea of how they could be constructed for other domains.

Kate will be given writing guides to help her organise her writing
John will participate in small group activities and be given opportunities to talk about
ideas and learn new vocabulary
Kate will be given a timetable for forward planning and organisation of her work
program
John will be given more practice using times tables
Kate will be given number lines and problem solving tasks to help her with whole
numbers.

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2.4

Department of Education

The home assistance to help the students progress section


(What you can do at home to help the students progress)

The advice provided here should relate directly to an area of improvement and describe
assistance that is feasible and not onerous. It should not create unreasonable demands on the
family. Preferably, the advice should relate to behavioural aspects of the students work, not
content or curriculum-based matters. For example, it is reasonable to ask parents to help
students complete a diary, but not to help them synthesise research materials.
The examples below are brief, practical and clear.
Ask Mark to put his vocabulary list on display to practise his spelling.
Encourage Costas to show you and talk about his artwork at home.
Encourage Peter to do some physical activity every day.
Continue to discuss the news with Maria.
Encourage Anna to read to the rest of the family.
Ask Kate to check her work diary each night.
Ask Nicholas to talk about what he is going to say in class presentations.

Sample comment prompts for the home assistance section


The sample comment prompts below are mainly for English and Mathematics, but they give
you some idea of how they could be constructed for other domains:

2.5

read to, read with


talk with
play time/memory games
provide opportunities for John to estimate and recognise
encourage Kate to work with other members of the family on small projects at home
encourage John to join a local sporting group to help him develop physical and social
skills
encourage Kate to talk about her daily events in the order they happened, staying on
the topic
revise the daily routine each morning to prepare John for the days activities and
events
assist with developing speed and accuracy in using times tables by playing times
tables games and relate times tables to everyday situations
use a timetable (e.g. train or bus) and ask questions about time intervals (e.g. if the
bus leaves at 2:15 pm what time will it arrive at this station?)
discuss the material Kate reads asking for an explanation of certain words or
different ways that something could be said.

The Student comment and My learning goals sections

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This feature of report cards requires students to develop their own awareness of their
successes, their learning needs and areas of improvement.
See Developing, Monotoring and Reporting on Personal Learning Goals (PDF - ) for further
advice.

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Section 3
Commentary on three completed reports
3.1

Alexanders report

Alexander Pappas
English

Learning Area

Year 8 Semester 1

Rating

English Reading

English Writing

English Speaking and listening

Interpersonal Development

Year 6

Year 7

Year 8

Year 9

Year 10

Work habits
Needs Attention

Acceptable

Very Good

Excellent

Effort
Class Behaviour

3.1.1 What Alexander has achieved


Alexander has
completed detailed
responses to texts
showing an excellent
understanding of and
engagement with the
characters, plot and
themes.
His writing folio
demonstrated
awareness of audience
and purpose and the
ability to explore
thoughtful and
interesting ideas. His
creative writing showed
some imagination.

This report focuses on English and Interpersonal


Development. It offers good evidence of achievement.
The comments in Alexanders report are clearly linked to
the Standards (English Level 5). However, other important
elements in the Standards are not referred to. For example,
there is little about interpersonal development and in
English there is no reference to either the variety of text
types Alexander reads and writes nor how challenging
they are. Characters, plots and creative writing refer to
fiction, but what other text types has he worked with? Is he
equally able to deal with all text types encountered during
the course? In describing work students complete, it is
useful to give a sense of how demanding tasks are, as well
as the variety of material students can cope with.

Alexander showed he
can contribute positively
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to small group
discussions and work
collaboratively in small
groups.

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3.1.2 Areas for improvement or future learning


Alexanders reading will
improve if he uses
library periods more
constructively and sets
aside regular time for
reading.

It is unclear what Alexander should do to make his library


periods more constructive. Is this a time-wasting issue, or
one of not understanding the librarys resources, or of not
knowing how to use the library effectively? The suggestion
to set aside regular time for reading is vague. How much
time? How often?

In his written work,


Alexander needs to
explore themes and
issues in greater depth.

There should be a focus on the kinds of reading Alexander


should do, not simply the time committed. Should he read
novels, newspaper feature articles, biographies? Is there
evidence that he reads some kinds of fiction that are too
simple for him now? Is there a list of suggested books from
which he should select, such as those in the Premiers
Reading Challenge, or a list available in the library?

In class, he should try to


participate more
frequently in class
discussions.

The report identifies a number of areas for future learning


that are linked to the standards, which are mainly easy to
understand.

Alexander should
establish more
productive working
habits, including: revise
for regular grammar
tests; enter all
homework in his diary;
use the proof-reading
and re-drafting process
consistently; maintain a
personal vocabulary and
spelling list; and use a
dictionary to check
spelling and a thesaurus
to widen his vocabulary.

These specific suggestions relating to work habits are


useful and easy to follow.

3.1.3 The school will do the following to support Alexander in his learning
This area of the report should reflect some of the areas identified for future learning.
It may be that Alexander needs help in using the library; or in selecting books that he is
likely to find enjoyable; or in suggestions for other material he could read.
It might be helpful for the school to monitor some of the suggestions for improving his
working habits. Suggestions for the schools actions to support Alexanders learning will
relate to the areas of improvement required. They could relate to implementing reading
programs, selecting appropriate reading materials and activities and planning his library
borrowing program.

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3.1.4 What you can do at home to help Alexanders progress


It may be that the parents can assist in monitoring some of Alexanders working habits. For
example, parents could: look at and sign his diary regularly; look with him at his vocabulary
and spelling work periodically and perhaps ask him to explain meanings of certain words.
Possible suggestions:
Check Alexanders diary every few days to ensure he has entered
all his homework in it.
Ask Alexander to show you his first draft and re-drafts, and to
explain the changes he has made.
Help Alexander to have a regular time for reading at home, at least
four times a week.

Anna Wong
Mathematics

Year 8 Semester 1
Rating

Mathematics

Number

Space

Measurement,
chance and data

Structure

Working
mathematically

Year 6

Year 7

Year 8

Year 9

Year 10

Thinking Processes

Work habits
Needs Attention

Acceptable

Very Good

Excellent

Effort
Class Behaviour

3.2.1 What Anna has achieved


Annas high level of
achievement indicates
commitment and dedication
to work.
Her test results show
excellent understanding of
concepts and procedures in
the dimensions of number,
measurement, chance and
data and space.

There is very little in these comments that is


specifically linked to Annas achievement in the
Thinking Processes domain. The comments made are
consistent with achievement at Level 5 in
Mathematics. They describe Annas work and so
provide evidence that Anna has completed work
above the level expected for the time of reporting in
all five dimensions. Aspects relating to Annas work
habits could have been reported in the Work Habits
section.

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Her accurate and logical


solutions to the task centre
problem-solving activities
and her problem-solving
report provide evidence for
her skills in Working
Mathematically.
Her three major projects are
accurate, detailed and very
well presented especially
the kitchen that was
uniquely designed by Anna.
They show her ability to
explain and understand
mathematical concepts
across the dimensions.
3.2.2 Areas for improvement or future learning
Although Annas work
was of a very high
standard, there are
areas where she could
improve.
She should show all
necessary working when
solving problems so that
errors can easily be
detected.

This comment acknowledges Annas standard of


achievement so that the suggested improvements are not
presented as faults but as ways to move forward.
This comment can be omitted as the next point includes it.

When she writes mathematical reports, Anna can


improve her interpretative skills by explaining very
clearly how her data, graphs and tables are related.

When writing
mathematical reports,
her interpretative skills
would improve if she
explained more clearly
how data, graphs and
tables are related.
3.2.3 The school will do the following to support Anna in her learning
Anna will be provided with assistance to improve her mathematical reports by explaining
more clearly how her data, graphs and tables are related.
This could be more specific about the type of assistance to be provided.
Anna will be provided with exercises that allow her to practise explaining how data is
related to a graph or table.
3.2.4 What you can do at home to help Anna progress

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Department of Education

This is a chance to affirm that her parents are supporting Anna and to encourage them to
continue to do so.
Continue to express interest in Annas work and to provide support for her study at home.
To help her improve her interpretative skills, encourage her to explain her mathematical
reports to you and ask her to clarify any points you find hard to follow.

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3.3

Department of Education

Johns Report
John Davidson
Year 4 Semester 2

Learning Area

Rating

Health and Physical Education

Interpersonal Development

Personal Learning

Civics and Citizenship

The Arts

English Reading

Writing

Speaking and listening

The Humanities

Mathematics

Number

Space

Measurement,
chance and data

Structure

Working
mathematically

Science

Design, Creativity and


Technology
Information and Communications
Technology

Thinking Processes

Year 2

Year 3

Year 4

Year 5

Year 6

3.3.1 What John has achieved


John has completed
several written pieces of
works this semester in
English. These all show
an understanding of
writing for different
purposes and audiences.
His spelling, grammar

The first comment deals only with completion of work,


and is of limited use, unless it notes a change in his usual
behaviour. It has the value of noting that there is a body of
evidence available, upon which the subsequent judgements
about purpose, audience, spelling, grammar and
punctuation are based.

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Department of Education

and punctuation meet


the expected level at
this time of the year.

The graphic representation of his achievement shows that


Johns writing is approximately at the expected standard,
the comment about spelling, grammar and punctuation is
not required.
It is important to avoid generalisations that really mean
could do better (most kids could) or should do better
(given what the teacher knows about John) in these areas.
In selecting areas for comment, look for patterns of
inconsistent achievement within and across domains.

Johns oral report on


families was
informative, with several
humorous anecdotes he
had collected from
elderly neighbours.

The comments about his oral language show John is able to


collect, select and present information in an informative
and entertaining manner.
This kind of recognition of Johns strengths is likely to
encourage him.

3.3.2 Areas for improvement or future learning


John usually finished his
work very quickly,
without planning out
what he was going to do
and how he could use
materials creatively.
John did not hand in his
assignment on
responding to famous
artworks. During
feedback he has not
commented on other
childrens artwork.

The report notes that John works quickly and neither plans
nor considers how his work could show creativity. This is
specific information, which parents should be able to
understand easily.
The second paragraph refers to Johns work completion.
Firstly, it notes that he did not hand in a specified
assignment. There is no information on why he did not
hand it in (didnt complete it, too hard, he was absent). It
also notes he did not comment on his classmates work.
These comments indicate absence of evidence for
achievement, but make no reference to improvement or
future learning.
Throughout, the language used in these comments refers to
the past: has displayed; usually finished; what he was
going to do; did not hand in; has not commented; has
had difficulty; has been.
Comments on areas for improvement and future
learning should look forward to the future more than back
to the past. The language should use expressions such as
needs to; could; should. The comments should focus
more on the behaviours the teacher hopes to see than on the
ones that are problematic.
Provide positive advice for an accessible strategy or
solution the student can adopt, e.g.
John needs to work more slowly using a plan
for using art materials. He needs to hand in all
assignments. He needs to participate actively
in group discussions of the work of classmates.
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In Physical Education,
John has had difficulty in
mastering some of the
movement patterns and
skills covered this
semester, particularly
balancing, hopping and
rolling. He has been a
reluctant participant in
sessions on a regular
basis.

Department of Education

The comment John needs to improve his motor


skills, particularly balancing, hopping and
rolling is easily understood and more specific.
It also links to the strategy the school could use, designed
to overcome a specific reason for low achievement:
The school will encourage John to participate
more regularly in Physical Education sessions
and ensure a partner assists him with rolling,
balancing and hopping activities.

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Section 4
Writing checklist
Aspects of
report

Actions to complete

Overall

Report is expressed in clear and succinct language

Yes

No repetition of comments
Clear coherence between sections
What the student
has achieved text
box

Key aspects of achievement noted


Comments consistent with ratings and standards
Comments focus on most important aspects

Areas for
improvement /
future learning
text box

Key aspects for improvement have been noted (most


important for this age, level, student; not too many)

School plans for


improvement text
box

Plans are linked to areas of improvement

Home assistance
text box

Realistic suggestions are linked to designated areas of


improvement

Focus on the future


Aspects are linked to areas of achievement
Plan is simple to understand and follow

Comments are short and clear


Suggestions are positive and achievable
Student comment
or learning goals
text box

Students have been provided with support and guidelines to


develop their learning goals
Strategies have been established for students to review and
record progress frequently
Strategies have been established for students to contribute to
the writing of the report

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No

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