What
is
Conflict
?
What is Conflict?
– Conflict is the dynamics when two or more people,
organizations, or nations perceived one another as a
threat to their needs or interests. Conflict is perceived
incompatibility of actions or goals between people or
nations and happens when there is an imbalance
between concern for oneself and those of others
(Conflict Resolution Group Foundation, Inc. 2014).
What is Conflict?
– Individuals and organizations without conflict are either
in denial, have no genuine concern for others, or simply
apathetic.
– People in conflict perceive that one’s gain is the other
party’s loss.
What is Conflict?
– A positive way of looking at conflict is to see it as
signifying involvement, commitment and caring. When
conflict is understood and recognized, it can end the
imbalance, stimulate growth and development, and
improve relationships (Myers 2013)
The Nature of Conflict
The Nature of Conflict
– Conflict inflicts so much pain and negative emotions on those
involved.
– Oftentimes, Conflict follows a cycle of retaliation. Conflict is
started by what known as a “triggering event”, which happens
when an act of one party is perceived as a threat by the other
party.
– The triggering event produces a threatening feeling on the other
party and this is often followed by a strong negative emotion like
anger and contempt.
The Nature of Conflict
– An angry individual, group or organization will then act out this
anger and will retaliate against the other party.
– This retaliatory act becomes the triggering event to the party that
initiated the first triggering event.
– The cycle goes on until this is broken through the intervention of a
third party, or when the two parties decide to sit down and discuss
the situation to seek a common solution to the crisis.
Conflict Stages
Conflict Stages
– According to the United Nations Economic and Social Commission
for Asia and the Pacific (ESCAP) publication on Conflict Negotiation
Skills for Youth (2003) , there are four stages of conflict that do not
necessarily happen exclusively at any single time, but may happen
simultaneously:
1. Intrapersonal
– with oneself, like when one is indecisive about things
2. Interpersonal
– among two or more individuals, like having a
misunderstanding between friends, family members, or
lovers
3. Intragroup
– within the same interest group, like a student
organization
4. Intergroup
– between two or more groups, like fraternities
Responses to Conflict
Responses to Conflict
– The amygdala immediately releases a knee-jerk reaction to the
situation until the pre-frontal lobes are able to process the
situation for a more appropriate reaction to either avoid or
confront the threat.
– Faced with a conflict situation, human beings often choose
between two types of responses, flight or fight.
Responses to Conflict
– For flight response, there are several types of behavior Involved:
avoidance, ignoring or denial.
• Avoidance means to evade or dodge the cause or strong
emotion or uneasiness one feels for another person who is in
conflict with you.
Responses to Conflict
• Ignoring is when you are in the same place as the other
person you are in conflict with, and you disregard and snub
his presence.
• Denying means when someone ask you if you are quarrelling
or in disagreement with the person you are in conflict with
and you disagree to refute the comment or observation.
Responses to Conflict
– In the book, Mediation for Managers: Resolving Conflict and
rebuilding relationships at work by John Crawley and Katherine
Graham (2002; 2007), the authors identified four strategies that
people can use when in conflict in the workplace:
1. Fight – force other party to accept a stand that is against the party’s
interest
2. Submit – yield to the demands of the other party and agree to end
the conflict
Responses to Conflict
3. Flee – leave the situation where the conflict is occurring or
change the topic
4. Freeze – do nothing and just wait for the other party’s next
move or allow the pressure to build up
What Creates Conflict?
What Creates Conflict?
– Conflict may arise due to the following (Myers 2013):
• Competing for scarce or limited resources such as time, jobs,
food, natural resources, and even love and affection within the
family or personal relationships
• Disagreement over the interpretation of facts or information
• Perceiving threats to one’s own needs and interests
• Perceiving unjust treatment caused by another person or entity
What Creates Conflict?
• Miscommunication between parties
• Misjudging another person’s or group’s belief systems born out
of prejudice or bias
• Exhibiting behaviors that are destructive to another person’s
well-being or reputation
Causes of Conflict
Causes of Conflict
– According to Christopher W. Moore in his book, The Mediation
Process: Practical Ways of Resolving Conflict (2003), there are five
causes of conflict: relationship, data, interest, structural and values.
– Conflict develops in relationship between individuals when there is
an imbalance in recognizing and providing for the needs or interest
of the other party; or between groups or nations when there is a
perceived imbalance in the distribution or sharing of power and
resources, or of opposing interests as well.
Causes of Conflict
– Conflict may also arise in the lack or misinterpretation of data, like
someone quoting research figures that may be questionable to
others.
– Interests are usually driven by needs, and when needs are not
met, conflicts happens.
– Structural causes of conflict usually involve human organizations,
social structures, or processes and procedures.
– Values are also causes of conflict when prioritization of these
values varies from one party to another.
Costs of Conflict
Costs of Conflict
– A pestering conflict may put one’s health and well-being in
jeopardy.
– Conflict may also decrease one’s self-confidence, doubt one’s self-
worth, and even one’s values.
– When nations are in conflict, the costs are oftentimes higher, such
as disrupted lives, destruction of life and property, and human
misery as people of warring nations experience displacement,
hunger, disease, and eventual death.
Costs of Conflict
– In work organizations, conflict results in expensive litigations,
decreased productivity as people are burdened by the strong
emotions involved when in conflict, and poor working
relationships resulting in the breakdown of organizational
teamwork (Crawley and Graham 2002).
Positive Effects of
Conflict
Positive Effects of Conflict
– Conflict can also serve as a driver or impetus for the growth in the
relationship between two persons, groups, or nations.
– Personal, as well as work relationships, that are in conflict can
resolve these through genuine communication and healthy
dialogue, trust, respect and caring.
Positive Effects of Conflict
– Relationships often grow deeper and more satisfying because it:
• Allows for issues to surface;
• Raises the awareness of both person’s needs;
• Allows emotions to be expressed;
• Understand and accept the uniqueness and differences of other
people;
• Strengthens the resolve of the parties to pursue common goals; and
• encourages dialogue and empowerment.
(Crawley and Graham 2002)
Conflict Management
Styles
Conflict Management Styles
– Dr. Ken Thomas and Dr. Ralph Kilmann, professors of management
from the University of Pittsburgh, developed what is now
popularly known as the Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode
Instrument to help people understand how they deal with conflict
by measuring a person’s behavior in conflict situations.
Conflict Management Styles
– According to Thomas and Kilmann, there are two dimensions to
this conflict resolving behavior : assertiveness or the extent to
which a person will try to satisfy his or her own needs or interests,
and cooperativeness or the extent to which a person will attempt
to satisfy the other person’s need or interests.
Thomas-Kilmann Conflict
Modes
– Based on the two dimensions, there are five modes in dealing with
conflicts. These are:
1. Competing – is assertive and uncooperative. An individual’s interest
are above all else, power and authority are often used to win against
others.
2. Accommodating- is unassertive and cooperative. An individual is
willing to neglect his or her interests or needs for the sake of the
other person, yielding one’s position and allowing the other to
pursue his or her position at the other’s expense
Thomas-Kilmann Conflict
Modes
3. Compromising – is moderately assertive and moderately cooperative.
An individual is neither her nor there, prefers to split whatever is at stake
in half to partly satisfy both parties just to get over the problem.
4. Avoiding – is unassertive and uncooperative. The individual prefers to
stay out of the situation either by postponing a decision, taking a wait
and see position, or withdrawing completely until conditions are better.
5. Collaborating – is assertive and cooperative. The individual seeks a
mutually satisfying solution by understanding the needs and interests of
the other person, and expanding the resources rather than competing
over them. Seeks a win-win solution.
Thomas-Kilmann Conflict
Modes
Negotiating Through a
Personal Conflict Situation
Negotiating Through a
Personal Conflict Situation
1. Understand the nature of the conflict
2. Acknowledge your feelings and emotions
3. Examine your relationship with this person
4. Clarify your intentions
5. If you wish to keep the relationships, have a talk with the person
involved
6. Once the dialogue is accomplished to your and the other person’s
mutual satisfaction, then grant a reconciliatory act
