Gaslighting

This article is about human behavior. For illumination derived from burning gas, see Gas lighting.

Google Trends topic searches for "Gaslighting" began a substantial increase in 2016.

Gaslighting is a colloquialism, defined as manipulating someone into questioning their own perception of reality. The expression, which derives from the title of the 1944 film Gaslight, became popular in the mid-2010s. Merriam-Webster cites deception of one's memory, perception of reality, or mental stability. Some mental health experts have expressed concern that the term has been used too broadly. In 2022, the Washington Post reported that it had become a buzzword improperly used to describe ordinary disagreements.

Etymology

Charles Boyer, Ingrid Bergman, and Joseph Cotten in the 1944 American film version of Gaslight

The term originates in the 1938 British play Gas Light by Patrick Hamilton. The play was adapted into a 1940 film in the UK, Gaslight, which was remade as in the US as the 1944 film Gaslight. Set among London's elite during the Victorian era, Gas Light and its adaptations portray a seemingly genteel husband using lies and manipulation to isolate his heiress wife and persuade her that she is mentally ill so that he can steal from her. One of the husband's tricks is to secretly dim and brighten the indoor gas lighting, insisting his wife is imagining it.

The gerund form gaslighting does not appear in the play or films. It was first used in the 1950s, particularly in the episode of The Burns and Allen Show; in The New York Times, it was first used in a 1995 column by Maureen Dowd. According to the American Psychological Association in 2021, gaslighting "once referred to manipulation so extreme as to induce mental illness or to justify commitment of the gaslighted person to a psychiatric institution". It remained obscure — The New York Times only used it nine times in the following 20 years — until the 2010s, when it seeped into the English lexicon. Merriam-Webster defines gaslighting as "psychological manipulation" to make someone question their "perception of reality" leading to "dependence on the perpetrator". The American Dialect Society named gaslight the most useful new word of 2016. Oxford University Press named it a runner-up in its list of the most popular new words of 2018.

In self-help and amateur psychology

Gaslighting is a term used in self-help and amateur psychology to describe a dynamic that can occur in personal relationships (romantic or parental) and in workplace relationships. Gaslighting involves two parties: the "gaslighter", who persistently puts forth a false narrative in order to manipulate, and the "gaslighted", who struggles to maintain their individual autonomy. Gaslighting is typically effective only when there is an unequal power dynamic or when the gaslighted has shown respect to the gaslighter.

Gaslighting is different from genuine relationship disagreement, which is both common and important in relationships. Gaslighting is distinct in that:

• one partner is consistently listening and considering the other partner's perspective;
• one partner is consistently negating the other's perception, insisting that they are wrong, or telling them that their emotional reaction is irrational or dysfunctional.

The term gaslighting is more often used to refer to a pattern of behavior over a long duration, not a one-off instance of persuasion, but the method(s) of persuasion is the defining trait of gaslighting behavior. Over time, the listening partner may exhibit symptoms often associated with anxiety disorders, depression, or low self-esteem. Gaslighting is distinct from genuine relationship conflict in that one party manipulates the perceptions of the other.

In psychiatry and psychology

The word gaslighting is occasionally used in clinical literature, but is considered a colloquialism by the American Psychological Association.

Barton and Whitehead described three case reports of gaslighting with the goal of securing a person's involuntary commitment to a psychiatric hospital, motivated by a desire to get rid of relatives or obtain financial gain: a wife attempting to frame her husband as violent so she could elope with her lover, another wife alleging that her pub-owning husband was an alcoholic in order to leave him and take control of the pub, and a retirement home manager who gave laxatives to a resident before referring her to a psychiatric hospital for slight dementia and incontinence.

In 1977, at a time when published literature on gaslighting was still sparse, Lund and Gardiner published a case report on an elderly woman who was repeatedly involuntarily committed for alleged psychosis, by staffers of her retirement home, but whose symptoms always disappeared shortly after admittance without any treatment. After investigation, it was discovered that her 'paranoia' had been the result of gaslighting by staffers of the retirement home, who knew the woman had suffered from paranoid psychosis 15 years prior.

The research paper, "Gaslighting: A Marital Syndrome", includes clinical observations of the impact on wives after their reactions were mislabeled by their husbands and male therapists. Other experts have noted values and techniques of therapists can be harmful as well as helpful to clients (or indirectly to other people in a client's life).

In his 1996 book, Gaslighting, the Double Whammy, Interrogation and Other Methods of Covert Control in Psychotherapy and Analysis, Theo L. Dorpat recommends non-directive and egalitarian attitudes and methods on the part of clinicians, and "treating patients as active collaborators and equal partners". He writes, "Therapists may contribute to the victim's distress through mislabeling the [victim's] reactions.... The gaslighting behaviors of the spouse provide a recipe for the so-called 'nervous breakdown' for some [victims, and] suicide in some of the worst situations." Dorpat also cautions clinicians about the unintentional abuse of patients when using interrogation and other methods of covert control in Psychotherapy and Analysis, as these methods can subtly coerce patients rather than respect and genuinely help them.

This increased global awareness of the dangers of gaslighting has not been met with enthusiasm by all psychologists, some of whom have issued warnings that overuse of the term could weaken its meaning and minimize the serious health effects of such abuse.

Motivations

Gaslighting is a way to control the moment, stop conflict, ease anxiety, and feel in control. However, it often deflects responsibility and tears down the other person. Some may gaslight their partners by denying events, including personal violence.

Learned behavior

Gaslighting is a learned trait. A gaslighter is a student of social learning. They witness it, experience it themselves, or stumble upon it, and see that it works, both for self-regulation and coregulation. Studies have shown that gaslighting is more prevalent in couples where one or both partners have maladaptive personality traits (such as traits associated with short-term mental illness like depression), substance-induced illness (e.g., alcoholism), mood disorders (e.g., bipolar disorder), anxiety disorders (e.g., PTSD), personality disorder (e.g., BPD, NPD, etc.), neurodevelopmental disorder (e.g., ADHD), or combination of the above (i.e., co-occurrence) and are prone to and adept at convincing others to doubt their own perceptions.

Habilitation

It can be difficult to extricate oneself from a gaslighting power dynamic:

• Those who gaslight must attain greater emotional awareness and self-regulation, or;
• Those being gaslighted must learn that they do not need others to validate their reality, and they need to gain self-reliance and confidence in defining their own reality.

Broader use

In 2022, Merriam-Webster named "gaslighting" its Word of the Year due to the vast increase in channels and technologies used to mislead and the word becoming common for the perception of deception. The word is often used incorrectly to refer to conflicts and disagreements. According to Robin Stern, PhD, co-founder of the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence, "Gaslighting is often used in an accusatory way when somebody may just be insistent on something, or somebody may be trying to influence you. That's not what gaslighting is."

Some mental health experts have expressed concern that the broader use of the term is diluting its usefulness and may make it more difficult to identify the specific type of abuse described in the original definition. According to a 2022 Washington Post report, it had become a "trendy buzzword" frequently improperly used to describe ordinary disagreements, rather than those situations that align with the word's historical definition.

In medicine

• "Medical gaslighting" is an informal term that refers to patients having their real symptoms dismissed or downplayed by medical professionals, leading to incorrect OR delayed diagnoses. Women and racial minorities are more likely to be affected by the phenomenon.
• Circa 2024, “medical gaslighting” was coined to describe negative patient experiences of having clinical concerns inappropriately dismissed or invalidated by their attending physicians due to systematics and or bias.
• “Medical gaslighting is when somebody presents with symptoms that are ignored or dismissed, chalked up to anxiety or imagination, possibly told they’re too young to develop cancer or chronic illness, and having their symptoms minimized without being properly addressed,” due to bias from medical practitioners. [1]

In politics

Gaslighting is more likely to be effective when the gaslighter has a position of power.

In the 2008 book State of Confusion: Political Manipulation and the Assault on the American Mind, the authors contend that the prevalence of gaslighting in American politics began with the age of modern communications:

To say gaslighting was started by... any extant group is not simply wrong, it also misses an important point. Gaslighting comes directly from blending modern communications, marketing, and advertising techniques with long-standing methods of propaganda. They were simply waiting to be discovered by those with sufficient ambition and psychological makeup to use them.

The term has been used to describe the behavior of politicians and media personalities on both the left and the right sides of the political spectrum. Some examples include:

• American journalists used the word "gaslighting" to describe the actions of Donald Trump during the 2016 US presidential election and his term as president.
• "Gaslighting" has been used to describe state implemented psychological harassment techniques used in East Germany during the 1970s and 1980s. The techniques were used as part of the Stasi's (the state security service's) decomposition methods, which were designed to paralyze the ability of hostile-negative (politically incorrect or rebellious) people to operate without unjustifiably imprisoning them, which would have resulted in international condemnation.

See also

• Confidence trick: using trust to defraud
• DARVO: acronym for "deny, attack, and reverse victim and offender"
• Deception: intentionally using false statements to mislead
• Hypnopedia
• Insecure attachment: desperate to hold onto relationships
• Manipulation: exploiting for personal gain
• Martha Mitchell effect: labeling real experiences as delusional
• Mind games: struggle for relationship superiority
• Naivete: favors moral idealism over pragmatism
• Political spin: political propaganda tactic
• Psychotherapy issues: unintended treatment problems
• Reality distortion field: Steve Jobs' particular ability to convince others of virtually anything
• Superiority complex: defense for feeling inferior