Get all 14 Louise Connell releases available on Bandcamp and save 35%.
Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of The Truth That I Suppose I Always Knew, The Machine, Golem 2020 EP, Golem 2020, Rope (Single Version), Crossed The Line (Single Version), Crossed The Line (Single Version), Squall Echo Rale, and 6 more.
1. |
Ten Feet Tall
03:21
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You will go where you need
Leave to find who you are
I’ve a thousand little vertebrae
To grow you up so far
I’ll sew them under feathers
At the base of your wings
With a kiss to make it better
As I tell you to remember
When it stings
You heal and grow
You used to be so tiny
Now you’re tall as your hopes
You’d fit in the crook of my arm
Now the world’s fitting into yours
I am right on your side
More than I’m on my own
Magnetic north to your compass
When you need to find home
You won’t know me for years
Quite the way I know you
All the broken boughs
And falling down
The little white truths
For when you need to know it all
Were you ever really tiny?
Mark ten feet on the wall
You’d fit in the crook of my arm
Now the world’s fitting into yours
When it stings
You heal and grow
You used to be so tiny
Now you’re tall as your hopes
You’d fit in the crook of my arm
Now the world’s fitting into yours
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2. |
Rope
03:47
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I’m forging quite a career in suppression
Whether passive aggression or a spineless silence
And I can’t remember if this ever helped anyone
But at least it worked for me
I’ve got my stairs
You’ve got your rope
Let’s meet in 10
On the 12th floor
Oh don’t look at me like that
We all have birthrights, don’t we?
It’s not my fault, and anyway
The stairs are so steep
It’s not my fault, and anyway
You’re so lucky
I have nothing
And you’ve still got your rope
I’m forging quite a career in suppression
Whether passive aggression or a spineless silence
And I can’t remember if this ever helped anyone
But at least it worked for me
I used to think it worked for me
You’ve got your load
And I’ve got mine
If no one’s helping
Why should I?
Oh don’t look at me like that
It makes me itch to see you
It’s not my fault
But, anyway, it still pains me
It’s not my fault
So couldn’t you make it easy?
I’m no mountaineer
What’s wrong with your rope?
Little more than nothing
And you still have your, you still have your
I’m forging quite a career in suppression
Whether passive aggression or a spineless silence
And I can’t remember if this ever helped anyone
But at least it worked for me
I used to think it worked for me
This never really worked for me
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3. |
We Night
04:28
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Mama, we sail
Mama, we fright
Mama, we stone
Mama, we night
Mama, I see
Mama, you hide
Mama, we sail
Mama, we night
Like weeds at roots of trees
Pillows in the sheet
Mama bear
Mama bear and me
Mama, you hurt
Mama, you smile
Mama, you hope
Mama, you hide
Mama, we run
Mama, we fight
Mama, I sail
Mama, I night
Like rungs into the dark
The paws that lose the bar
The cub can only swim so far
Like weeds at roots of trees
Pillows in the sheet
Mama bear
Mama bear and me
Dear cub of mine
Forgive me for disturbing your hibernation
And dragging you through the curtained street tonight
And thank you, mine
For following the rules of your mama bear’s game
You remember how you sailed from me
In your cotton ocean
How you’d hold on tight while stormy waves engulfed you
Well, baby bear, let’s play one last time
Hold my hand, you be good you be
Baby bear, let’s play one last time
Hold my hand, you be good you be still
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4. |
Ilo
03:21
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Spending my days trying to claim
No one was seeing any of me
Like I was total, embryonic potential
And zero kinesis
I’d feel my hand at the switch
With my mouth forming, “I lo...”
I’d never stick to a single mode
Of my cutting my heart out
I’d withdraw and hide and cloak
Like I was something to escape
When total inversion
Was a worthy disguise
When I’d try to disappear
The moment I looked in your eyes
Felt your gaze in me
I couldn’t have you try
and fail
to see
With my hand at the switch
Like a closed eyelid in the morning
Like lungs before a breath
With my mouth forming, “I lo...”
And now my foolish threads are pulled
And I know I’m seeing all of you
And we are total embryonic potential
And budding kinesis
And my hand’s at the switch
Watching your closed eyelids in the morning
My lungs draw in a breath
And my mouth is forming
“I love”
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5. |
Fruit
03:53
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I’m a crooked, wizened
Pile of old dreams
That shift all around
Shooting down my nerves from
An old mind
To the muscles in an old hand
And I’ve seen countless lives
I’ve never lived
Little smooth knuckles
Forming so many perfect fists
I’m not asking
I’m not wanting
But sometimes I hear a laugh
When it’s quiet
And it’s dark
When I feel more love
Than I can comprehend
And I have to talk aloud
Even when no one’s around
Slap the back of my own hand
List all the reasons that I can’t
I’m not asking
I’m not wanting
I’m not asking
I’m not wanting
But sometimes I hear a laugh
There’s no garden
There’s no orchard
Fruit is trampled
Fruit is foraged
I’m not asking,
I’m not wanting
but sometimes I hear a laugh
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6. |
Crossed The Line
03:20
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I could have been a genius
But I crushed the brains out of my skull
I could have been a lover
But soft love would make my skin crawl
I could have been a monster
But the screams would fester in my mind
I could have been a good friend
But I always crossed the line
I always crossed the line
I call myself a native; I’m a tourist in a thinly veiled disguise
But you won’t guess until you catch me in the eye
And then you’ll start to notice how the idioms don’t work
How I speak slowly as if I’m translating every sentence first
I could have been a genius
But I crushed the brains out of my skull
I could have been a lover
But soft love would make my skin crawl
I could have been a monster
But the screams would fester in my mind
I could have been a good friend
But I always crossed the line
I always crossed the line
It’s no fun being a tourist when you didn’t even pack
When you don’t come from anywhere but you’re still dying to go back
And the natives are impatient, and they only care enough
To misunderstand your empathy and diminish your love
And I could have been a genius if you’d tested me in my native tongue
I could’ve loved you gently, if it ever seemed much fun
I could have been a monster; sure, I could have the person for you
But friends was just another game that I was meant to lose
Like life’s a game I’m bound to lose
I could have been a genius
But I crushed the brains out of my skull
I could have been a lover
But soft love would make my skin crawl
I could have been a monster
But the screams would fester in my mind
I could have been a good friend
But I always crossed the line
I always crossed the line
I could have been a genius
I could have been a lover
I could have been a good friend
I could have been a monster
I could have been a player
I could have been a winner
I could have worn the right mask
And followed all the right rules
But I always crossed the line
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7. |
No Visitors
03:30
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Little girls have smiles long as guts
Hairs that catch the light and glister like blood
And open ears to crawl inside
Whisper rose, whisper summer, whisper lies
Decaying maggots burrow in disguise
With their
Kindness and false hope
Oh, dear
She’s not longed for,
Desired or
Needed
She may be sunken treasure but no one’s ever been holding their breath
Maybe no one out there loves her
It’s half past three on the ward
And still no visitors
Little girls are tied to railway lines
Little girls are little boys(’) to find
And if I’m lost I’m fodder for the tracks
It’s no great loss if a few fall through the cracks
You can love all you want like you might ever be loved back
With your
Kindness and false hope
Oh, dear
She’s not longed for,
Desired or
Needed
She may be sunken treasure but no one’s ever been holding their breath
Maybe no one out there loves her
It’s half past three on the ward
And still no visitors
Half past four on the ward
And still no visitors
Half past five in the morgue
And still no visitors
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8. |
Loophole In Your Life
03:03
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All the things that I have loved
Are sitting inside these bricks
And I don’t know how I swung this
But I have a record of events
A list of all the details
A recipe for how to fix
For how to make a little life
Or two
So I am writing a reminder
Many thousands of reminders
Tattooed all across my body
That say
Don’t take this for granted
It’s not like anybody planned this
Unseen quirk of fate
The loophole in your
Loophole in your
Little life
All the things that I have loved
Are holding me together
Are patching scars I felt were
forever
And is it fair
How I fell into this?
That someone as broke as me could be happy
Without trying
But I don’t take this for granted
I don’t think anyone could plan this
Unseen quirk of fate
The loophole in our
Loophole in our
Contracts
I thought my hand was dealt a while back
And I’d accepted all the terms
What I deserved
What I’d been told was the most to hope for
But I won’t take this for granted
It’s not like anybody planned this
Unseen quirk of fate
The loophole in your
Loophole in my
Loophole in our
Little life
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9. |
My Wandering Mind
03:48
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No I’ve not been sleeping
But I can’t see how that counts
Who dictates what’s right?
And on what grounds,
If we’re all headed down?
While I can’t be sure
I can I can I can
Convince myself
Beat my heart
When I’m too tired
Open my eyes
And stop the sleep
Breathe my lungs
But burn the pyre
If you know for sure
I’m gone for good
Cause if all my life
And all these bones
Amount to nothing
Morning’s mine and night’s
When thoughts ooze out and can’t be caught
And in the dark my wandering mind
Loses sight
Can’t make it home
And we agree there’s no such thing as a soul
Beat my heart
When I’m too tired
Open my eyes
And stop the sleep
Breathe my lungs
But burn the pyre
If you know for sure
I’m gone for good
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10. |
Get To Know Me
05:03
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Hello mister, is your daughter home?
I thought I’d come and visit
When I call I feel like I’m waiting
I feel I’m always waiting, sir
I didn’t realise this time wasn’t good for you
I just want to speak to her for a moment or two
You see, we’re very much in love
And I am splendid, sir
When you get to know me
I did the honourable thing
I knocked on the door
I didn’t realise her father was a man of your stature
You intimidate me, sir
But I am standing here alone
I am small but I am strong
I am stronger than you know
But my heart is feeling low
I am stronger than you know
But my heart is hurting so
My heart is hurting
Darling, you tease me with your promises
You lose me
If you’d just get to know me
You’d see how wonderful I am
You’d get past the nonchalance
I wish someone would for once
And if I cry, well I don’t care
I know it seems wrong, I know it seems wrong
I know that I seem wrong
But it feels like I should
Darling, you tease me with your promises
You lose me
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11. |
Outside
06:08
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Maybe I should go outside
And scream into the night
Go out for a walk
That turns into a fight
With my body
Maybe I should aim
Where I don’t want to land
My intentions never matter anyway
You’d bleed even if the crosshair was on me
Maybe I should go outside
Scuff the welcome mat and leave
I’m so hungry for the air
But I can’t breathe in there
I never could
And now I know I never will
You’re always fighting
And pushing thoughts into each other
Using anger as a way to bridge the gap that it creates
So while you’re battling reason with reason and chaos with chaos
Hiding bruises with makeup and setting up for round two
I’ll step outside
Slip away from the light.
Maybe I’ll leave tonight
Oh I’ll go outside
You’re always fighting
And pushing thoughts into each other
Using anger as a way to bridge the gap that it creates
So while you’re battling reason with reason and chaos with chaos
Hiding bruises with makeup and setting up for round two
I’ll step outside
Slip away from the light.
Maybe I’ll leave tonight
Oh I’ll go outside
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12. |
Maria
03:34
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The wine glass slithers down the wall
The cooker’s on but the room is cold
Maria, where’s the girl who swallows lies,
And coughs them up as smiles?
Woozy laughter creeps the halls
Boys giggle loud when there’s something wrong
Maria, how deep did they dig?
Enough for metal in their milk?
Maria, won’t you comfort them?
They bleed you, feed the half that’s his
The girl who cut her tongue to keep
The no’s and stops and whys asleep
Maria, won’t you comfort them?
Maria, can’t you look at them?
His tidal voice erodes her coast
Hands creep on every face but hers
She rises from the tiles like every hemline
She sees the air and chokes on breaths
She hears the boys ebb desperate laughs
They’ll say Maria lost her battle
She’ll say that she won the war
Maria, won’t you comfort them?
They bleed you, feed the half that’s his
The girl who cut her tongue to keep
The no’s and stops and whys asleep
Maria, won’t you comfort them?
Maria, can’t you look at them?
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13. |
Careful Unplanned
04:15
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I think this is one that you’ll be able to see
I know it’s locked up tight
But I’ve whispered the key
And you listen
For little frequencies few people hear
And I think that it’s time I took a pace forward
Make your strides to me
A little less awkward
Fall into us
An act of intention
In the careful unplanned
I threw my watch at the wall
When my lungs felt your breath
Looked in the mirror and shouted,
“Off with her head!”
Unfurled my thoughts
And my clothes
Stitched little yesses over bleeding no’s
I’ve got to manage my expectations
It’s so hard to love and so easy to run
But I’m being broken and built, melted and moulded
Into something that can
Something that wants this
I fell from my certainty
As bare as it might have been
One day I stopped thinking
And now I’m lost but I’m trusting
In the careful
In the careful unplanned
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14. |
Most Righteous People
03:33
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I'm born in the fire and I'm striking out
I've got myth on my side
It's so hard to fight lies
And I'm stalking the streets
Cloven toes on my feet
I've got myth on my side
It's so hard to fight lies
You're expecting so much
But I expect expectations
I've got myth on my side
It's so hard to fight lies
I'm not going to hurt you but I do have to laugh
You've got myth on your mind
You're just fighting a lie
So don't feel hurt
When I turn out to be good girl
When all those foundations
Crumble like sand and you see
You can still be righteous
And wrong
Like most righteous people are
You won't gamble with me
Are you wary it's true?
I've got myth on my side
You've got bad odds on yours
And you're awfully defensive
For somebody who's right
It's so hard to be pious
But so easy to lie
So don't feel hurt
When I turn out to be good girl
When all those foundations
Crumble like sand and you see
You can still be righteous
And wrong
Like most righteous people are
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15. |
Shrapnel
04:08
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Tiptoe the pavement
We're coiled and impatient to implode
Quieting our black hole souls
The hairs on our arms
Catch the air with a crackle and a spark
When the shop fronts stare at dying stars
And our ashes lose the taste of fire
And we finally know what we were
As we see what we are
I'll inhale all the dust from your veins
I'll gorge on shrapnel
And we'll blast inwards from charred fingertips
Towards our beating
Once beating hearts
Tiptoe the tower
We're what-if manifests tonight
We're the darkness it takes to see the light
We sprint and we scramble we're ash on the air as it rises
We're freckling clouds on the horizon
We look almost intact on the horizon
You can say it's not real from the horizon
You can say till it catches you hiding
Till the day it needs you and it finds you
Till it wakes you and it wants you
Until
You've inhaled all the dust from their veins
And gorged on shrapnel
And we've caved inwards from charred fingertips
Towards our beating
If I can't mend all the cracks in the glass
They'll rip right through us
If I don't swallow the fire as it spills
I will burn
I will burn too
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16. |
Where I'm From
03:01
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Most folk are frightened of silence
Where I'm from
Their latest collection of words
Blethered and blurted
Like a bingo caller
Looking out to a dark sea of faces for a match
Most folk are frightened of talking
Where I'm from
I reckon they'd say just about anything
To avoid a conversation
It's amazing how much you can say
Without speaking at all
But I love silence
And I hate chatting
I'd like to talk
But no-one says anything to me
Where I'm from
Some folk are frightened of losing where they're from Where I'm from
They'd cut off their children to spite them
And all of their choices
Their affected voices
Successes and failures and big cars and houses
Some folk are frightened of changing
Where I'm from
Of sobering up long enough to regret
The decisions that were made for them
And the plans that were laid
Shut up, drink up and stay
But I don't get it
So I don't quite fit
I've tried to run
But there's no place for me
Except where I'm from
Except where I'm from
I'll accept where I'm from
Where I've been
Where I'm going
The place that will hold my shape
When I am done
Hold my shape when I am done
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17. |
Viscous Fear
04:20
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A blast of tonic radiation
My skin dripping pools
Of hot adrenaline
Everything was gleaming like the sun
Oh, the sun
Oh, the sun
A little pill, a little scar
My guts in the sink and my hair on the floor
The poison in my veins hot as the sun
Oh, the sun
Oh, the sun
A nursery rhyme for the other side
A microcosm of my life
Coats a hundred glass slides
I cried eyelashes with my tears
My viscous fear
An eyelash tear
My viscous fear
A tarmac stain
Spelling numbers
How many years will the body linger?
I can't tell who won this in the end
In
The
End
A nursery rhyme for the other side
A microcosm of my life
Coats a hundred glass slides
I cried eyelashes with my tears
My viscous fear
An eyelash tear's
My viscous fear
I was promised tallying the clouds
Soothed with talk of finite light ebbing into nothing
I was promised
I was promised
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18. |
Did I Save The Day?
03:51
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The shine dulls to see through the glass
But night time'll see us last
Could you see anything?
And I guess we're the sum of our parts
But now you don't see me as a person
Just a girl without a heart
It's no one's fault
It's just the way
I tried so hard to hold on
Funnily, my hand broke right through the clay
Did I save the day
this time?
The frequency was too high to hear
Let's muse over if there was a voice
If no one heard a noise
But that's a joke
Were your screams poetic chords?
I tried so hard to hold on
Funnily, my hand broke right through the clay
Did I save the day
this time?
And if someone ruins the ending
am I entitled to stop reading?
If the fun goes, if the pleasure slows
do I have to keep on eating?
And if it all comes tumbling down
do we have to start all over again?
I'm not displaying virtue
I'm just holding this whole thing off
I tried so hard to hold on
Funnily, my hand broke right through the clay
Did I save the day
this time?
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19. |
10ft Tall
02:36
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You will go where you need
Leave to find who you are
I’ve a thousand little vertebrae
To grow you up so far
I’ll sew them under feathers
At the base of your wings
With a kiss to make it better
As I tell you to remember
When it stings
You heal and grow
You used to be so tiny
Now you’re tall as your hopes
You’d fit in the crook of my arm
Now the world’s fitting into yours
I am right on your side
More than I’m on my own
Magnetic north to your compass
When you need to find home
You won’t know me for years
Quite the way I know you
All the broken boughs
And falling down
The little white truths
For when you need to know it all
Were you ever really tiny?
Mark ten feet on the wall
You’d fit in the crook of my arm
Now the world’s fitting into yours
When it stings
You heal and grow
You used to be so tiny
Now you’re tall as your hopes
You’d fit in the crook of my arm
Now the world’s fitting into yours
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Louise Connell Glasgow, UK
“A diverse, deep-vein double album which vaults her into contention as one of the most insightful and pertinent songsmiths, anywhere, to have emerged in recent years.”
Record Collector
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