1. |
Dead Writer
04:16
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Welcome to my bachelor pad
I stay here when things get bad and I
Just want to get away
Send the kids outside to play
And do whatever I want
Because I don’t want to be your lover anymore
But I’d be a fool to let you out the door
Like Exley on the davenport
Or Carver fishing off the shore I just
Know I can write a book
One sunny day is all it took to change
Pour the booze down the drain
Cuz I don’t want to disappoint you anymore
And I don’t know what all this drinking has been for
So tell me which part you want me to be and I will try
If this is where the story ends why do I have to lie to you
When I don’t want to anymore
So if there’s a way out of this mess
I’ll find it when I’m less depressed
Right now I just want to disappear
Happiness won’t visit here
It’s true
I’m out of the loop
Cuz I don’t want to live in this world anymore
But death is not the thing I’m looking for
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2. |
Love Is Not Enough
03:20
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Talk to me
Tell me how it feels to always see everything in a major key
When I’m drowning in ennui
Cuz all I do is try to conjure up a little sun for you
And when it doesn’t come you ask why the sky ain’t blue
And things show no sign of looking up
Love is not enough
I wonder if it ever was
I shouldn’t have to break you down to build me up
These days it seems
No one even cares if you get hurt
Cuz being kind is just a phrase that you wear on a t-shirt
I can’t believe the worst kinds of people achieve
Everything they want
But it takes medication to get me off
So sick and tired of living in a rut
Love is not enough
I wonder if it ever was
I shouldn’t have to bleed you dry to fill me up
I shouldn’t have to break you down to build me up
Love is not enough
I wonder if it ever was
I shouldn’t have to bleed you dry to fill me up
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3. |
Wringer
03:23
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How did it come to this
Dividing of possessions?
Only reason it got this far is your
Childish obsession
With everything you thought I’d be
But could not deliver
All that loving me ever did was run you through the wringer
You say you don’t do it for fame
Or financial gain
And didn’t you always stick by me
Through everything
You give the sweetest kisses dear
But you leave the stinger
All that loving you ever did was run me through the wringer
So don’t just sit there playing with your life
Honey pull the trigger
You’ve gotta leave everyone behind
To really be a winner
You give the sweetest kisses dear
But you leave the stinger
All the honey that we made started tasting bitter
I want to be a symphony but I’m just a singer
And all that singing ever does is run me through the wringer
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4. |
Can't Think
04:40
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Desperate and selfish
Say I can’t help it
Hopelessly jealous of the time you spent away
Living the highlife
I find my spotlight
In deranged fantasies of the things you didn’t say
It’s almost too much to take
Loving you baby
I can’t think when I’m in love
It’s never good enough
Why can’t I just close the door
And let the work be the reward
Is there a God or
Is that my upbringing
Telling me to cast aside the little I have earned
I don’t believe in anything yet I don’t
Take the time to find something that maybe I could learn
It’s almost too much to take
Loving you baby
I can’t think when I’m in love
It’s never good enough
Why can’t I just close the door
And let the work be the reward
The work is the reward
I can’t think when I’m in love
It’s never good enough
Why can’t I just close the door
And let myself be more than yours
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5. |
Say My Name
04:32
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Say my name
Cuz I forget who I am
Give me a reason
To put some effort in
Finish what I started to write down
Cuz you’re the only one who knows me now
I’m going out
Just to run into your friends
But I’m watching the clock
Cuz if you don’t come in
Feels like I’ll meet every gin in this town
But you’re the only one who knows me now
And when it was good it was very good
I was always floating on your cruel cloud
But how did I get so wrapped up
I couldn’t pick my face out of a crowd
I guess that’s why you’re the only one who knows me now
And there were times that I thought
You were my only friend but it can’t be true
If you’re not around
You’re just the only one who knows me now
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6. |
Never
04:17
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In a second floor apartment
The heat does rise
It’s a sensory bombardment
Sweat and tears in your eyes
Well isn’t this what everybody does
Go out on their own
I was the one who wanted more
Now I’m just sitting at home
And I know that I’m not ever gonna get you back
Let me tell you that I’m sorry cuz I owe you that
Well I walk around in autumn
And tell myself it’s new
But it doesn’t feel that honest
With no one to report to
But I’m standing on my own now
Isn’t that what everybody wants
I’m not a liberated woman
Just a country bumpkin dilettante
But I know that I’m not ever gonna get you back
Let me tell you I regret it cuz I owe you that
I carry around this pain I live with all the mistakes I made
I carry around this pain knowing you don’t care that I went away
I carry around this pain wonder what you’re doing every day
Happiness comes from within that’s what everybody says
Maybe learning that I have none in me was the point of all of this
I know that I’m not ever gonna get you back
Let me tell you that Im sorry cuz I owe you that
You’re the blood in my veins and the bone in my back
And I know that I’m not ever gonna get you back
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7. |
Daughter
04:59
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What is my body worth to you
Without your blood in it
Is my story worth the read
Without your name on it
Where you find me at the bottom of a lake
What a headline that would make
There’s never been a better time to be alive
The arms of opportunity are spread wide
I wanna be a part of you but it’s not enough
If I gave you a daughter would you open up
Oh to be like Mary full of grace
You’d be worshipping my body and my brain
Cuz I know you never take me at my word
It’s always something you’ve already heard
Why can’t I show you this side of me
And prove to you who I could be
There’s never been a better time to be a wife
I wanna show you something you can’t memorize
I wanna teach you baby but you’re all grown up
If I gave you a daughter would it be enough
Don’t call me sister victim or your child bride
I’ve been somebody’s woman on the side
Just take me for what I already am
Honey make me feel like a man
Cuz there’s never been a better time to be alive
The same sun shines in everybody’s sky
But everything inside of me has turned to dust
If I gave you a daughter would you open up
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8. |
When You're Gone
02:57
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When you’re gone
There will be no healing
No moment of clarity
You will be dead
There will be no reeling
Out into the street
Cuz there was never anything I could do
Never anything anybody could do
I lie awake and wonder when it’s coming for me
My fifteen minutes of weakness
There is no peace
Not a hint of camaraderie
In this fistfight around the casket
And there was never anything I could do
Never anything anybody could do
So if that’s what you meant
When you said “I’ll give you something to cry about”
Well I want out
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9. |
September
04:51
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Happy birthday, make a wish
I know this isn’t really how you want to celebrate it
Withdrawal shits and gun fights on the lawn
All your friends are idiots
Man the air really went out of his balloon, didn’t it
I wish he would just leave us alone
So hold your breath past the cemetery now
Feels like it could still be all right somehow
And I can smell the winter on the breeze
It makes me feel like starting over
Do you wanna go somewhere with me?
Cuz I can see that you’re a bird
Let me grab onto your wings and fly out of this world
I can see it’s never gonna change
And I’m so tired of being harangued
I know if we leave he’s gonna be mad
But I’ll kill anyone who tries to make me stay
So even though I don’t know where to go
We’re almost to the end of Kauffman road
But I can feel the wet grass on my cheek
And I think this time it’s really over
Is anybody going to rescue me?
Can I get a ride?
Daddy’s got the gun out tonight
And the neighbors are all riled up
But I wanna have some fun
To the kids you’re a hag
To the older ones you’ll always be a spoiled brat
But there’s some things people never really see
So I know the turnpike ain’t the place to be
But at least you’re here with me
And I can smell your Mitchum on the breeze
It makes me feel like I’m getting older
September is the only time I’m free
So can I get a ride?
Daddy’s got the gun out tonight
And the neighbors are all riled up
I wanna have some fun
September is the only time I’m free
But I know this time it’s really over
So do you really wanna fuck with me
I swear this time I’m really gonna leave
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10. |
Don't Bother Mountain
05:02
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Carolina lost my identity
Or it’s coming in the mail, either way
I’m not the same, and it isn’t just a change of place
I’ve slowed to a lion’s pace, pacing here
Anything for you my dear
Anything to keep you near
This can’t be where it all ends
The summit of don’t bother mountain
I am on the verge of brilliance
You’re on the verge of death
I’ve been patiently taking my time
Or I’m just lazy, your guess is as good as mine
All I know is leaves have grown
Over my soul
All I know is leaves have grown over my soul
And stopped the fountain
I know I am not there yet
The summit of don’t bother trying
I don’t need all the things you took from me
I’ll get em back eventually
It’s not the source of pain
It’s the family that gets to me
Either way you’re not the same
Everything has changed
Either way everything’s changed
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