PLANES, TRAINS AND AUTOMOBILES

BY

JOHN HUGHES

5/22/86
REVISIONS

•
 1.

TRAINS, PLANES AND AUTOMOBILES

By
John Hughes

EXT. NEW YORK CITY - 59TH AND MADISON

The city is on the edge of winter. Late November.
Thanksgiving week. Tuesday. The sky is low and dark.
The sidewalks are clogged with pedestrians bundled against
the chill wind blowing down the avenue. Shoulder-to-shoulder
stampede of independent, socially incompatible human units
returning to their domiciles after a day's work. Traffic
is as traffic will be. Slow and tangled. Within the
protective confines of their rolling pieces of territory,
the drivers are more expressive and bold than the foot
soldiers on the sidewalks ..

EXT. STREET CORNER

A young MAN of unspecified origin is bustling, stocking caps
on a corner.

EXT. ANOTHER CORNER

A cop is frisking a young BOY against a store, barely noticed
by the current of passersby.

EXT. MID-BLOCK
A SALVATION ARMY TRIO is singing. Their voices are barely
perceptible against the drone of the traffic.

EXT. GM BUILDING
The white marble tower dwarfing the thousands crossing its
plaza.

C.U. ROLEX WATCH

On a man's wrist. It reads 5:56. A shirt and jacket cuff
slowly slide down over the watch.

C.U. SHEET OF PAPER

Folded in thirds. A man's hand discreetly opens the top fold
to reveal a travel itinerary. His index finger scans a line
stopping on ... DEPART NEW YORK 6:00 PM UNITED 105.
 2.

C.U. NEAL PAGE

A handsome young man. Early thirties. Impeccably dressed,
perfectly coif~d, elegantly dressed. A successful man deeply
in control of his life. His eyes shift from down to up.

INT. CONFERENCE ROOM

A cold, stark conference room. Marble table, harsh cove
lighting, black leather, high-back chairs. Neal and an older
MAN, JOHN DOLE are on one side of the table. Across from him
are three nearly identical middle-aged MEN. Dark suits, white
shirts, dark ties, dark hair combed straight back. They're
studying a series of ad layouts. The man in the middle is
holding one of the ads.

C.U. AD
It's for lipstick.

C.U. NEAL
He looks at his watch again. He's nervous about the time.

C.U. MAN
he's staring at the ad, considering it. Can't make up his
mind.

C.U. JOHN
He looks at Neal.

C.U. NEAL
He looks at John. Shakes his head in disgust. He taps his
watch and mouths, "i GOTTA GO!"

C.U. JOHN
He nods. He understands. He shrugs.

TRIO
Still staring at the ad. No expression, blank faces.
 3.

INT. CONFERENCE ROOM

Neal looks at his watch again. He leans back in his chair.
He's annoyed. The man sets the ad down. He looks across the
table, opens his mouth to speak. John and Neal lean forward
to receive his words. He shuts his mouth and picks up the ad
again.

INT. RECEPTION AREA

Luxury and style. Leather and stone. Neal bursts out of the
offices and crosses the reception area. He's carrying a
briefcase and a two suiter. John is right on his heels.

NEAL
I swear to God, John, one of these
days I'm going to strangle those
guys.
He hurries out double glass doors into the hallway. He sets
down his briefcase and presses the DOWNbutton on the elevator
bank.

NEAL
Two solid hours staring at the
layouts to decide to reconvene after
the holidays for a fresh look at the
material? Are they completely out
of their minds or am I being
unreasonable?

JOHN
They're out of their minds but
they're the client.
NEAL
They're not curing cancer, they're
selling cosmetics for Christ's sake!

JOHN
Alot of their cosmetics may well
cause cancer. They're rich, they're
arrogant and they're stupid. But
they pay the bills.
Neal presses his finger into the heat-sensitive button again.
NEAL
You're not going to the airport?

JOHN
I'm going out in the morning. No
way I'm breaking my nuts rushing for
(MORE)
 4.

JOHN (Cont'd)
a plane tonight. Why don't you hang
with me and we'll fly out tomorrow?

NEAL
You can pull that with your wife. I
can't. If I'm not home tonight, the
marriage is a historical fact. It's
going to be bad enough getting along
with a houseful of relatives but if
we're fighting, it's gonna be hell.
JOHN
What's the difference if you're home
at nine tonight or nine tomorrow
morning?
NEAL
To Susan, failure to meet one's
scheduled arrival time is a sure
sign of marital infidelity.
JOHN
She doesn't trust you?
NEAL
Does your wife trust you?
JOHN
No. But I screw around. You don't.
NEAL
My mistress is a line of women's
cosmetics.
JOHN
If it's that bad, you better split
and you better sit down and decide
how you're going to free up some
time for the family. A bad marriage
eats time like you and me eat
peanuts.
NEAL
Yeah.
The elevator BELL SOUNDS. He picks up his briefcase.
NEAL
Have a nice holiday.
JOHN
That's a contradiction in terms.
 5.

NEAL
Amen.
The elevator doors open and Neal turns to face a capacity
crowd in the elevator.
NEAL
Everybody inhale!

INT. GM BUILDING - LOBBY

The elevators disgorge their passengers, Neal among them.
He's very anxious and annoyed by the slow moving crowd.

INT. LOBBY - DIFFERENT ANGLE

There's a large crowd at the doors. Neal cranes his neck to
see what the delay is.

INT. LOBBY - REVOLVINGDOORS

An elderly woman is moving through the doors at a snail's
pace. She stops, takes a breather, moves another half a foot,
stops ...

EXT. BUILDING PLAZA

Neal squeezes out of the building and hurries across the
plaza.

EXT. STREET
A crowd of people waiting for buses and taxis line the curb.
Neal slips through to the curb and takes a frantic look up
and down the avenue.
NEAL
Shit ... !

EXT. 59TH STREET

Neal hurries down the street, weaving through pedestrians,
throwing an arm up and letting out a sharp whistle every time
he spots a cab.

EXT. PARK AVENUE

A tangle of traffic. People hailing cabs. Arms waving.
 6.

C.U. CAB LIGHT

It goes on.

C.U. MAN ON THE STREET

A middle-mana<Ji!r sort. He sees the light on the cab, puts his
fingers to his lips and lets out with a piercing whistle.

HIS POV
The cab he's hailing starts a move to the curb.

EXT. 59TH STREET

Neal spots a cab, cuts between parked cars into the street.
He opens the back door and starts in.
NEAL
LaGuardia.

INT. CAB - DRIVER

He turns in his seat. Gruff Russian immigrant. No bullshit
taken.
DRIVER
I'm off-duty.

NEAL
He's not going to take no for an answer.
NEAL
Ten bucks over the meter. I'm in a
hurry.

DRIVER
He's OFF-DUTY!
DRIVER
I'm off-duty. Get out. Close the
door.
 7.

NEAL
He can't believe the guy won't take his offer. He increases
it.
NEAL
Twenty bucks.

DRIVER
He's pissed.
DRIVER
You don't close the door? Hell with
you ..•
He turns in the seat and hits the gas.

EXT. STREET
The cab lurches forward, Neal jumps back, his briefc~se goes
flying.

C.U. BRIEFCASE
The aluminum Haliburton case hits pavement and slides under a
parked car. The car pulls out, rolling over the briefcase,
flattening the center.

EXT. PARK AVENUE

The cab we saw before edges toward the curb. It's one lane of
traffic away.

EXT. 59TH STREET AND PARK

Neal hurries along with his bent briefcase and smoldering
temper. He glances at his watch.

C.U. WATCH
It reads 5:11.

C.U. NEAL
He's furious and panicked at the same time. He scans the
street.
 B.

HIS POV
The cab pulls up to the curb.

C.U. NEAL
He sees the cab light.

C.U. LIGHT
Glowing white and free.

EXT. STREET

The man who hailed the cab steps into the street and grabs the
handle to enter the cab. Neal rushes up.
NEAL
Are you taking this cab?
MAN
Yeah. I saw it first.
NEAL
Can I have it?
MAN
Can George .Schultz shoot arrows out
his ass?
NEAL
Yes or no?
MAN
I have no idea. I don't now George
Schultz.
The man opens the cab door.
NEAL
Fifty bucks if you let me have the
cab.
The man hesitates. The CABBIE blows his horn.

MAN
Fifty bucks?
CABBIE (O.C.)
Corne on!
 9.

NEAL
Fifty bucks.
MAN
Anybody who'd pay fifty bucks for a
cab will certainly pay seventy-five.
Behind Neal's back, a portly man in a navy blue, polyester
overcoat drags a streamer trunk, a sample case and suitcase
to the cab.
NEAL
Fine.
MAN
Good. A hundred bucks.
NEAL
A hundred bucks?
MAN
You're the one in the hurry.
Neal reaches for his wallet. The Cabbie gets out of the cab
and pops the trunk. He helps the portly man hoist the trunk
into the cab. They throw the suitcases in and slam the trunk
shut.
NEAL
You're a thief.
MAN
More or less. I'm an attorney.
Neal counts out a hundred dollars in twenties. The portly man
gets in the cab and it pulls out. Neal hands over the money.
NEAL
(sarcastic)
Happy holidays.
MAN
This'll help.
Neal turns to find the cab gone. He snaps his head down the
street.

HIS POV
The cab has pulled away and is working back into the traffic
flow.
 10.

EXT. STREET - NEAL

He's furious.
NEAL
Son of a bitch!
MAN
Force mejure, my friend. Force
mejure.
He pockets the cash and steps back up on the curb. Neal takes
off after the cab:

EXT. STREET - CAB

It's stopped at a light, turning left. Neal runs between the
waiting cars to the cab. He whips the door open and looks
inside.

HIS POV
A portly man in his late thirties, DEL GRIFFITH, looks up at
him with alarm. He's wearing the navy overcoat, a cheap blue
plaid suit, blue, polyester dress shirt and navy polyester tie
with a tie bar.

C.U. NEAL
He's livid.
NEAL
You took my cab, you son of a bitch!

C.U. DEL
He's surprised. He thought it was his cab.
DEL
I did?

C.U. TRAFFIC LIGHT

From red to green.

EXT. STREET
The cab lurches ahead. Neal jumps back, the briefcase goes
flying again.
 11.

C.U. PAVEMENT
The case hits the deck and is nailed by a bus tire.

EXT. STREET - NEAL

He's standing in the middle of the moving traffic. Defeat.

EXT. LAGUARDIA AIRPORT

A horrible jam of cars and buses.

EXT. ARRIVAL ZONE - BUS

A double decker airport bus is emptying of cut-rate travelers.
Loaded tourists, haggard bottom-end business types and Neal.
He's carrying his flattened briefcase, the FAO Schwartz bag
and his two-suiter. He urges the people along.
NEAL
Corne on, people, please!

INT. AIRPORT
Neal races across the crowded lobby to the ticket counter.
A long line. He sets down his stuff and takes his ticket out
of breast ~ocket. He looks at it and then •t the line. He
looks at his watch.

C.U. WATCH
It's 5:49.

C.U. NEAL
He's in a panic.
NEAL
What's the problem for God's sake?
The woman in front of him turns around, glad to share her
anger.
WOMAN
Some jerk's been up there for ten
minutes.
 12.

INT. LOBBY- TICKET COUNTER

A harried FEMALETICKET AGENT is tapping on her computer keys.
AGENT
Smoking or non-smoking?

C.U. DEL GRIFFITH

The guy who took Neal's cab is the jerk that's been taking ten
minutes.
DEL
(to himself)
Smoking or non?
(to the agent)
I'm trying to quit so sometimes I
like non-smoking because it forces
me to lay off the butts but then if
we hit weather and I get shaky, I
like to smoke.

AGENT
He sighs.
AGENT
Smoking or non-smoking?

DEL
He thinks, clicks his tongue.
DEL
Can I get an aisle seat in the last
row of the non-smoking section so
that if I change my mind I can ask
someone to switch? If you don't
have an aisle, I'll take a window
but if all you have are middle
seats, I'll go non-smoking because
if I don't have enough elbow room
I cheese everybody off reaching for
my smokes. Also, is this a dinner
flight? But before you answer let
me say that I noticed you're wearing
a wedding ring and I just want to
say that your husband is a very
lucky man and your perfume is
heavenly.
He smiles warmly.
 13.

INT. CORRIDOR
Neal's running full-out down the corridor. He rounds a corner
and comes to a stop.

INT. CORRIDOR- SECURITY CHECK POINT

There's a huge crowd, long line.

INT. CORRIDOR- NEAL

He can't win. He joins the line. Looks at his watch.
NEAL
Never make it. Never. Dammit!

INT. CORRIDOR- METALDETECTOR

Del Griffith is, again, the cause of the delay. He's emptying
his pockets of anything metal. A SECURITY GUARDis scanning
with a hand-held detector.
DEL
You have no idea how often this
happens to me.
The guard isn't interested in conversation.
DEL
It doesn't bother me. You're doing
a job and I appreciate it. I'm the
last person who'll give you flak,
believe me.
The guard gets a loud reading at Del's feet.

C.U. DEL'S FOOT

The guard lifts his pant leg to reveal, stuck in the back of
his cushion sole loafer, a shoe horn. He pulls it out.

GUARDAND DEL
He shows Del the shoe horn.
DEL
Son of a gun_! I wondered why my
damn foot hurt all day. Isn't that
something? I must have walked eight
miles with that in my shoe.
 14.

The guard dismisses him. Del takes his sample case and his
briefcase and waddles off down the corridor.

INT. AIRPORT - DEPARTURE LOUNGE COUNTER

A harried MALE TICKET AGENT is besieged by angry flyers.
He says nothing. Ignores the fray. Goes about his tasks.

INT. AIRPORT - LOUNGE

Neal is in the midst of the angry flyers. He has his smashed
briefcase clenched under his arm, his two-suiter over his arm,
tie loosened, ticket in hand.

C.U. DEL
He's holding everything up at the counter.

DEL
I ordered a special meal. Anyway to
let me know if it's confirmed?

AGENT
He stares at Del.

AGENT
They'll let you know on board.
I can't help you.
He hands Del his ticket.

C.U. DEL
He smiles.
DEL
You're doing your job and I appreci-
ate it. Thanks. I like you, I like
your airline.
He gives the guy a wink and turns to face Neal.

C.U. NEAL
he recognizes Del as the person who jumped his cab.
 15.

NEAL AND DEL

Del recognizes Neal.
DEL
I know you. I'm very good with
names but darn if I haven't
forgotten it. You're with
Mishawauka Fabrics, right?
NEAL
No. You stole my cab today.
DEL
I stole a cab today?
(dawns on him)
Oh, yeah! You tried to jump in my
cab.
(aside)
I paid for my cab ride.
NEAL
Forget it. Excuse me.
He pushes around Del to the counter. Del feels badly that
Neal may be upset with him.
DEL
Are we having a misunderstanding?
Neal ignores Del and hands his ticket to the agent.
DEL
The cab was just sitting there. I
jumped in. Come to think of it, it
was awfully easy to come by during
rush hour. That was your cab?
NEAL
Yeah. Forget it.
DEL
I can't forget something lfke that.
I'll bet you're steamed with me.
Did you get here okay?
Neal looks at him. Says nothing.
DEL
I guess you did.
A SUPERVISOR steps behind the counter and speaks quietly to
the agent. The agent hands Neal his ticket and boarding pass.
 16.

TICKET AGENT
Thank you.
He turns to the flight board, removes the departure time and
replaces it with one that reads, DELAYED.

C.U. NEAL
He stares at the sign. The rush was for nothing.

INT. FLIGHT LOUNGE - LATER

Neal's sitting in one of the row seats reading a newspaper.
As he turns a page, something catches his eye.

HIS POV
Del's directly across from him in the facing seats. He has a
cigarette in his mouth, a cardboard food box with a pair of
jumbo hot dogs in it. He's applying mustard from individual
packets. He takes a final drag on the smoke, ~nuffs it out in
the smoker, takes a huge bite of the hot dog and lets the
cigarette smoke trail out his nose.

NEAL
He's revolted. He lifts his paper to shield him from the
sight.

C.U. WALL CLOCK

It reads seven o'clock.

INT. FLIGHT LOUNGE

Neal's reading a magazine. He's in shirtsleeves. He lowers
the magazine and sniffs. Some horrible odor's disturbing his
reading. He looks down. ·

HIS POV
Stocking feet. One foot scratches the other. WE MOVE UP FROM
THE FEET TO DEL, He's chomping on a toothpick, reading a
pornographic novel.
 17.

NEAL
He goes back to his magazine.

INT. MEN'S ROOM

Neal walks in. We HEAR LOUDWHISTLING. Neal stops and looks.

HIS POV
Del's in his undershirt, face lathered, razor in hand. He
looks across at Neal.
DEL
Howdy, traveler.

NEAL
He sighs and crosses to the urinal.

DEL
He continues shaving.
DEL
On the road quite a bit? I am. I
know these airlines. An hour delay
means an hour and a half .. Snow in
Chi-town. It's the damn lake. All
that moisture. Chicago goes and the
whole national air transportation
schedule takes a dump. I'm used to
it. If you told me it was raining
carmel corn in Chicago, I'd believe
you. Bad weather town. Great
pizza, the best hot dogs in the
world, great parks. Damn nice zoo.
Good aquarium, excellent art museum,
although I've never been their
personally. Knowledgable cab
drivers. Good newspapers. Nice
hotels. A bit high-priced but
comfortable. You enjoy blues music?
Blues? You like the blues?
He turns.

HIS POV
Neal's gone.
 18.

DEL
He's surprised that Neal's left. A little disappointed.
He's obviously a man who likes conversation. With anyone.
He shrugs, turns back to his shaving. He finishes his
conversation.
DEL
Very good tasting tap water.
Friendly, hard-working people •••

INT. AIRPLANE
Neal's at the door of the plane arguing with a STEWARDESS.
NEAL
I couldn't discuss it with the
ticket agent because I didn't know
he put me in coach. I have a first
class. ticket.
STEWARDESS
I'm sorry, I can't help you. First
class is full. Save your boarding
pass and you'll get a refund on the
difference.
NEAL
I don't want a refund, I want a seat
in first class. Where I belong.
Where I was booked and ticketed.
STEWARDESS
Sir, I can't help you: I have to
ask you to take your seat. I'm very
sorry.
NEAL
You delay me, you bump me. What's
next?

INT. AIRPLANE - COACHCLASS SEATS

Neal's in the middle. seat. ·on one side of him is a WOMAN with
a BABY. On the other side is Del Griffith. Neal's burned,
fried, defeated, blown-out and comatose.
DEL
Is this a coincidence or what?
Neal doesn't say a word. Del offers his hand.
 19.

DEL
I never introduced myself. Del
Griffith, American Light and
Fixture, Director of Sales, shower
curtain ring division. I sell
shower curtain rings. The best in
the world.
Neal looks at Del's outstretched hand. He sighs. It's going
to be a terrible flight. As much as he'd· like to tell Del to
take a flyer, he can't. He's not that kind of man. He clasps
Del's big, friendly paw.
NEAL
Neal Page.
Del pumps his hand.
DEL
Nice to know you. What's your
business?
NEAL
Advertising.
DEL
Advertising? Super. I love
advertising. I do a little of that
game myself. Not officially. I
help our customers with suggestions
for their advertisements in trade
journals and what not. If you've
got a shower curtain in your home,
there's a fifty percent chance that
the rings holding it up were sold to
your supplier by me, myself and I.
I like to kid people that if it
weren't for me and American Light
and Fixture and the shower ring
division, Janet Leigh probably
wouldn't have caught her lunch in
Psycho. You see that flick?
Neal nods yes.
DEL
I like to joke but that one was no
joke. I was new to the business
when that baby hit the silver sc~een
and that shower murder left a crap
stain on tne reputation of shower
curtains the size of Texas. Pebble
glass shower doors took a big bite
out of our sales for several years.
(MORE)
 20.

DEL (Cont'd)
We're back on our feet now. We're
doing good. The young people going
into their first homes don't have
the same phobia about showers that
their parents had. That Alfred
Hitchcock. You know what that
"Birds" film did to parakeet sales?
El Dumpe, Jack. El Dumpe. Good
friend of mine lost his shirt. You
use curtains or doors in your home?
Neal stares at him.
DEL
Doors? Hell, it's no sweat off my
back. I'm just happy to have
someone to talk to. I finished my
book about an hour ago. Filthy
goddarn thing. When you travel as
much as I do, you run out of reading
material. If it's been published,
I've read it. Fiction, nonfiction,
the classics. Robbins, Krantz,
Hailey, Spillane. You name it, I've
read it. I got so hard-up last week
on a layover in Atlanta, I read a
biography of Prince. That's not his
real name, by the way. It's Rogers
Nelson.
Neal smiles and nods politely.
NEAL
I'm afraid I'm not much of a
conversationalist. I like.to take
advantage of flight time to get a
little work done.
DEL
Don't let me stand in your way. The
last thing I want to be remembered
as is an annoying blabbermouth.
Del reaches into the seat pocket in front of him and removes
the airline magazine. Neal bends over and opens his crushed
briefcase. He takes out a bound report. Del glances down at
the briefcase.
DEL
What the heck happened to your
briefcase? A bus run over it?
NEAL
Yeah.
 21.

DEL
I have a Samsonite. Bus ran over it
once. Not a scratch. What'd you
pay for that one?
NEAL
It was a gift.
DEL
Mine, too. Gift from the company
for getting the shower ring contract
for the U.S. Navy. You know how
many rings that is?
NEAL
Alot.
DEL
Over a million.
Neal smiles and opens his report.
DEL
I figure that over the years several
million sailors are going to use
those showers with our rings and if
they take the time to ~otice what
kind of rings they are and they
feel they're good rings, when they
get out of the service and consider
shower rings, they'll select ours.
It's a shot. I look to the
long-term. How about yourself?
NEAL
Yeah. Can you excuse me?
DEL
Sorry. I'm being a blabbermouth,
aren't I?
NEAL
No, I'd just like to finish ••.
DEL
Tell me I'm a blabbermouth.
NEAL
You're not a blabbermouth.
DEL
I am. Tell me.
NEAL
It's alright. Really.
 22.

DEL
Come on. Say it.
NEAL
Alright. You're a blabbermouth.
Del stares at him. Hurt.
NEAL
Sorry. You told me to say it.
DEL
It's true. I'm the one who's sorry.
I won't say another word.
Neal sighs. Del's driving him mad.
NEAL
I really have to finish.
Del holds up his hand, cutting Neal off. He leans back in his
seat and opens the magazine. Neal waits a beat and opens his
report. They both read for a few moments. Del lowers his
magazine.
DEL
You know why we're not taking off?
Chicago's socked in. Bet you three
bucks and my left nut.

EXT. CHICAGO - O'HARE AIRPORT

The airport is nearly lost to a blizzard. All modes of
transportation are dead.

INT. PLANE - LATER

Del's sound asleep, mouth open, snoring. Neal's sipping
coffee, going over papers. He sets down the report and looks
at his watch. He looks at Del.

HIS POV
Del's facing him, eyes closed, mouth open.

C.U. NEAL
Staring at Del.
 23.

HIS POV
Del opens his eyes.
DEL
Six bucks and my right nut we're not
landing in Chicago.

INT. WICHITA AIRPORT - CORRIDOR

Neal's on a pay phone.
NEAL
Why am I in Wichita? Because we
couldn't land in Chicago.
(pause)
I know it's snowing. That's why we
couian•t land.
(pause)
I have no idea. All the airlines
said was we're refueling and
continuing on to Chicago. They're
probably lying but what else can I
do?

INT. AIRPORT - DEL

He's in a flight lounge, sitting, smoking, watching Neal.

HIS POV
Neal's across the corridor, talking on the phone.

C.U. DEL
He yawns.

NEAL
He looks at his watch and wraps up the conversation.
NEAL
It's quarter to eleven. Go back to
sleep. I'll be fine. I have a key.
You go to sleep. Okay? I love you.
Okay. Bye.
He hangs up the phone. He curses under his breath and starts
back down the corridor. Del calls to him.
 24.

DEL
Neal? There's no way on Earth we're
taking off from here tonight.
Neal stops and turns. Del gets up from his seat and shuffles
into the corridor.
DEL
I may not know the price of eggs in
Sweden, but I know the U.S. air
transport system and when you waylay
to Wichita enroute to Chicago,
you're up the creek. I'd venture to
say Old Man Winter's busting records
in Chicago right now.
Neal's a little worried that Del may be right. But he's not
prepared to take any advice.
NEAL
I guess I'll find out soon enough.
DEL
By the time you wait for the
airlines to pull the plug on the
flight, which they will sooner or
later, you'll have an easier time
finding a three-legged ballerina
than a hotel room. I know Wichita.
I know airlines. I know the hotel
scene. They start diverting flights
here and you don't book a room,
you're looking at a couple nights on
a dirty floor.
NEAL
You're saying I'll be stuck in
Wichita?
DEL
I'm saying you are stuck in Wichita.

C.U. NEAL
A look of alarm.

INT. AIRPORT - FLIGHT LOUNGE

Neal's standing at the window, looking out on the field.
There's a weary crowd milling about, waiting for news.
 25.

INT. AIRPORT - FLIGHT LOUNGE- BOARDINGCOUNTER

An airline REPRESENTATIVEaddresses the crowd over the PA.
REP
I'm sorry to inform you that we're
canceling flight 105 due to severe
weather difficulties in Chicago.
Representatives will be arriving
shortly to assist you in making
further arrangements. On behalf of
everyone at the airlines, we're
sorry. Thank you.
he clicks off and prepares for the onslaught.

C.U. NEAL
He rests his head against the cold glass.
NEAL
Shit .••

INT. BAGGAGEAREA
Del's dragging his trunk across the floor to the doors. He
has his sample case, suitcase and briefcase resting on it.
Neal's at the door with his two suiter over his arm, his
crushed briefcase under his other arm. Del stops, straightens
up and addresses him.
DEL
How many times have I been right so
far?
NEAL
I've lost count.
DEL
Did you book a room?
Neal shakes his head, no.
DEL
Did you try?
NEAL
Every place in the book.
DEL
Filled?
 26.

NEAL
To the rafters.
DEL
I've slept on many an airport floor
in my life and times.
He drags the case the rest of the way to the doors.
DEL
I've been waylayed more times than I
can remember. A day here, two days
there. Once I was stuck in Salt
Lake for four days waiting to get
into Denver. I prepare.
NEAL
You got a room?
DEL
As soon as I got off the plane. You
called home, I called the Interstate
Inn.
NEAL
I missed that one.
DEL
Most people do. But they'll be
plenty popular tonight.
NEAL
Well, see you around. I'm going
across the way to the Hilton and get
a bite to eat.
DEL
Coffee shop closes at eleven.
NEJ>,L
Elev.en?
DEL
On the nose. People in this berg
live by the clock. I'll tell you
what, I know the manager of the
Interstate Inn pretty well. Sold
him the rings in his showers. You
pick up the cab fare, I'll see that
he puts you up.
For the first time in hours, Neal brightens.
DEL
Grab an end, will ya?
 27.

Neal sets his briefcase on top of the trunk and lifts his end.
NEAL
Jesus Christ! What•ve you got in
here? Rocks?
DEL
When I go out on the road, I go out
on the road.
They lumber the trunk out the doors to the cab stand.
NEAL
How far is this place?
DEL
Just up the road a piece.

C.U. TAXI METER

It reads $124.50.

INT. CAB - BACKSEAT

Del and Neal are in the back of the old Checker.
DEL
I'll tell you, Adolf Hitler would
have been appalled at this bread's
morals. I mean she was bad. I
don't think there's a worathat's
been invented to describe •••
NEAL
Where the hell is this place?

Del leans forward and talks to the driver.

DEL
How much further, Angus?
DRIVER
Not much.
DEL
Why didn't you take the interstate?
DRIVER
You said your friend's never been
here. I thought he might like to
have a look around. You don't see
nothin' on the interstate but
interstate.
 28.

Del leans back in the seat.

NEAL
(lowers his voice)
It's the middle of the night.
DEL
(softly)
He's proud of his town. That's
pretty darn rare these days.
NEAL
You know him?

DEL
I been on the road many years, my
friend.

EXT. HOTEL

Just off the highway. An anonymous cinderblock rectangle.

The kind of place you stay in once. Emergency shelter.
Trucks parked everywhere. The taxi pulls in.

INT. LOBBY
Fake wood and naugahyde. A tiny front desk, two sofas, a rack
of tourist info, a pay phone, a newspaper box and an easel
with a cardboard sign with words in glitter -- DON PELTRAM'S
ACCORDION HIJINX. Del and Neal lug the truck into the lobby
and set it down. The DESK CLERK stands up from his chair
where he's sitting watching TV.

DEL
Evening, Gus.

CLERK
Del Griffith? How the hell are you?
DEL
I'm still a million bucks shy of
being a millionaire. How are you?

GUS
I was doing pretty good there for a
while but Sunday I pissed my pants
during "60 Minutes" so I guess I
gotta go back in for more plumbing
work. I got your room all ready for
you.
 29.

DEL
Great, Gus. I'd like you to meet an
old friend of mine. This is Neal
Page. Neal, this is Gus Mooney.
Gus reaches his hand across the desk. Neal shakes it.
NEAL
Glad to meet you.
GUS
Likewise.
DEL
We were flying into Chicago from New
York and a storm brought us here.
GUS
I know all about it. I musta got
half your flight already booked in.
Now tell me, Del, am I just getting
old or are they letting fat gals be
stewardesses these days?
DEL
Times change, Gus. I told Neal
you'd be able to fix him up.
Gus clucks his tongue.
GUS
You know, Del, I'd rather shoot
arrows out my ass than disappoint
you or a friend of yours but I'm
booked solid. I got three of those
fat gals sharing a single as it is.
One twin and two cots and them cots
are really built for youngsters.
Neal looks at Del with a sigh.
DEL
Nothing, Gus?
GUS
If old Herbert Hoover come back from
the dead and needed a room for the
night, I couldn't help him. Sorry.
NEAL
That's alright, I'll just go back.
DEL
You spend a hundred and a half
getting here. You want to blow that
and more to sleep at the airport?
 30.

NEAL
It's no problem.
DEL
If you don't mind a little snoring,
you can bunk with me.
NEAL
That's alright. I'll be fine.
DEL
I don't mind.
NEAL
It's okay.
DEL
I'm straight as an arrow.
Neal chuckles.
DEL
It's no skin off my nose·if you
sleep in a chair.
GUS
If you're going back, you better let
me know so I can call you a cab.
We're pretty far out. It'll take a
good while.
DEL
You may as well stay.
NEAL
I can't impose on you like that.
DEL
Tell you what. You pick up the room
tab and I won't be imposed on one
iota.

INT. HOTEL ROOM

It's dark, the door opens and Del walks in. He turns on the
light. Neal looks in. His face drops.

HIS POV
A tiny room with a double bed.
 31.

NEAL AND DEL

NEAL IS HORRIFIED. DEL'S EXCITED.
DEL
New bedspreads!

INT. MOTEL ROOM- BATHROOM- SHOWER

Neal's standing in the shower with his face to the spray. He
enjoys the relaxing heat and clean. Something occurs to him.
He moves his head out of the spray and looks up.

HIS POV
The shower curtain rings.

INT. ROOM
Del's in his pajamas. He takes a pillow from out of his trunk
and a photograph. He looks at it fondly.

C.U. PHOTO
It's of a young woman. Friendly and comfy, not very pretty
but full of life and smiling like a Crest ad. The photo's
probably fifteen years old.

INT. ROOM
Del kisses the picture and sets it on the nightstand next to
the bed. He closes the trunk and slides it against the wall.
He takes his dopp kit out of the suitcase, closes it, sets it
on top of the trunk and turns on the TV. He dials in a
religious program. He slips a quarter into the bed vibrator
and lays down.

INT. SHOWER
Neal reaches for the soap. Stops short.

HIS POV
The soap dish. a tiny bar of soap covered with hair.
 32.

C.U. NEAL
He carefully holds the disgusting bar of soap to the spray to
wash the hair away.

INT. BED
Del's enjoying a good vibration. A beat and there's a knock
on the door. Del crosses to the door and opens it. It's
a pimply pizza delivery BOY. He has a large pizza and
six-pack of beer.
DEL
How much?
BOY
Nine bucks.
Del takes the pizza and the beer. He sets the pizza on top of
his suitcase and the six-pack on the vibrating bed. He looks
around for his wallet. He sees Neal's pants hanging over the
chair. He hesitates for a moment, throws a look to the
bathroom, fishes out the wall~t, extracts a ten and gives it
to the boy.
DEL
Keep it.
BOY
A dollar?
DEL
100 pennies. All yours.
BOY
You got any more?
DEL
Nope.
BOY
Okay. Thanks.
Del closes the door. He crosses to the pizza and opens the
box.

C.U. PIZZA
The ugliest pizza ever made. Cheese, sausage, olives, green
peppers, japalenos, kraut, bacon, beans, corn, anchovies.
 33.

INT. ROOM
Del scoops a piece of the abomination out of the box.
DEL
Dinner's here!

INT. BATHROOM- SHOWER

Neal pulls open the curtain to reveal a completely sacked
bathroom. Towels on the floor, sink half-filled with soapy
water, toothpaste on the counter top, flecks in the mirror,
toilet paper unraveled, Del's bathrobe on the back of the
door.

C.U. NEAL
He's revolted, looks for a towel.

HIS POV
From a wad of used towels in a puddle on the floor to a towel
rack with two washcloths. A hand reaches for them.

C.U. NEAL
He tries his hair with washcloths.

INT. ROOM
Del's in the vibrating bed, eating pizza, watching TV. A few
beats and the bed stops vibrating. Neal comes out of th•
bathroom in his boxer shorts.
NEAL
Do you realize that you used all the
towels?
DEL
I'm pretty big and they were pretty
small. I'm sorry. It wasn't too
neighborly of me.
NEAL
And almost all the toilet paper.
DEL
Those New York hot dogs. I'm
guilty.
 34.

NEAL
You left the bathroom a filthy mess.
DEL
I'm not used to a roommate.
Neal sniffs. Makes a horrible face.
NEAL
What smells?
DEL
The pizza came.
NEAL
That's pizza?
DEL
It's good. I saved you a piece.
NEAL
You didn't order me a salad? I
asked you to.
DEL
They didn't have salad. I had him
put extra vegetables on the pizza.
NEAL
Beautiful ..•
He crosses to the box and looks into it. He makes. another
face and takes the box around to the front of the bed and sits
down. He scoops out the last slice. He takes a bite.

NEAL
Mmm. Horrible. If I wasn't so
hungry, I'd throw up.
DEL
Wash it down with a beer.
Neal sets the pizza down and pulls a beer off the six-pack.
NEAL
Warm?
DEL
It comes out warm, what the hell
difference does it make how it goes
in? Toss me one.
Neal tosses Del the beer. He takes another. He and Del open
simultaneously. The vibrating bed has sufficiently shaken the
beer to provide a double beer explosion.
 35.

INT. ROOM - LATER

The lights are out. Del and Neal are in bed. It's quiet.
DEL
I'd switch pillows with you but I'd
sneeze all night. I carry my own
pillow. It's hypoallergenic. I had
no idea those beers were going to
blow like that.
NEAL
You had the beer on a vibrating bed.
What'd you think was going to
happen?
DEL
It's been a long day. It didn't
occur to me.
NEAL
It didn't occur to you so I have to
sleep in a puddle of beer.
DEL
I'm sleeping in pizza. You want to
switch?
NEAL
No. I want to sleep.
DEL
Same here. I'm bushed.
NEAL
Good night.
DEL
Sleep tight.
There's a long pause. Del strikes a match and lights a
cigarette.
NEAL
What're you doing?
DEL
Having a butt.
NEAL
In bed?
DEL
Do you have a problem with that?
 36.

NEAL
A big problem.
DEL
I'm not going to fall asleep.
NEAL
I'd rather not risk it. I don't
smoke. Smoke annoys me. Especially
in the dark, in bed.
DEL
I always have a smoke before I fall
asleep.
Neal switches on the light.
NEAL
I was on my way home to spend a nice
holiday and five days off with my
family and instead I'm in a motel
bed with a stranger five hundred
miles away from my house and I don't
know how or when I'll get there.
I'm a patient man. I'm paying for
the room. I paid for the cab .•.

DEL
You paid for the pizza, too.

NEAL
I did?
DEL
All I had was a hundred. The kid
didn't have change.
NEAL
You went in my wallet?
DEL
Are you mad?
NEAL
You have no right to go in my
wallet!
DEL
What was I supposed to do? I had
to pay for the pizza. You were
showering. Did you want me to send
some punk kid in to look at your
dick?
 37.

NEAL
You stay out of my stuff.
DEL
(offended)
I'm not interested in your stuff.
NEAL
Good.
DEL
In fact, I'm bored with your stuff.
NEAL
What? You looked?
DEL
I didn't look.
NEAL
Then why are you bored with it?
DEL
(lying)
It's a figure of speech.
NEAL
Bullshit! You went through my bags!
Del jumps on the defensive.
DEL
How did I know you weren.•t some kind
of shady guy? I'm not sleeping with
a stranger without knowing a little
about him. What if you had a gun
in your bag? I been on the road
too long to not know to take a
precaution or two.
NEAL
Did I go through you~ stuff?
DEL
I don't know. Did you?
NEAL
No, I did natl And I'm mad as hell
that you went through mine.
DEL
Two suits, two dirty shirts, some
stale shorts and some skin
magazines.
 38.

Neal's embarrassed.
DEL
Don•~ sweat it, Neal. There's a
reason every hotel newsstand sells
those kind of magazines. There
isn't a married· man alive that
hasn't •••
NEAL
You done with your goddamn
cigarette?
Del takes one last puff. He drops it in a beer can and
swishes it out.
DEL
Done.
Neal turns off the light. He settles back into the bed.
There's another long pause.
DEL
Neal?

NEAL
What!

DEL
I have got to fart something fierce.

Neal turns on the light. He's furious. He grabs his pants

and slips them on.
DEL
Hey! I'm just being honest, for
Christ's sake! I could have sneaked
it on you.
Neal grabs his shirt.
DEL
Where' re y·ou going?
NEAL
I'm sleeping in the lobby.

DEL
Aw, come on! I'll go in the john.
He pulls back the covers and slides his legs over the side of
the bed.
 .
39.

DEL
If your kid shits his trousers do
you smack him?
Neal stops at the door. He throws a look at Del.
NEAL
What the hell are you talking about?
DEL
You're not a very tolerant person.
NEAL
I'm a very tolerant person.
DEL
Oh, really?
NEAL
Look, you've been under my skin
since New York. You ripped off my
cab •..
DEL
I know all this. You paid for
the room; the pizza ••• you•re a
tight-ass.
NEAL
How'd you like a mouthful of teeth?
DEL
You're hostile, too. Nice
personality combination. Hostile
and intolerant. That's borderline
criminal.
NEAL
Screw you! You spill beer all over
the bed, you smoke, you make a mess
of the bathroom •••
NEAL
And I let you stay in my room. I
let you pay for it so you wouldn't
feel like an intruder which you most
certainly are.
NEAL
I'm an intruder?
DEL
You're an intruder. I was having a
nice trip until you walked into my
life.
 40.

NEAL
I walked into your life?
DEL
With golf shoes on!
NEAL
Who talked my ear off on the plane?
DEL
Who told you to book a room? Out of
the goodness of my dumb old heart,
I offered you help. You're an
ungrateful jackass. Go sleep in the
lobby. Go ahead. I hope you wake up
so stiff you can't move.
Neal hesitates at the door.
NEAL
You saw me coming. You're no saint.
You get a free room. Free cab.
And somebody who'll listen to your
boring stories.
Del glares at Neal.
DEL
You want to hurt me? Go ahead. If
it makes you feel better ••• be my
guest. I'm an easy target. I like
people, Neal. I even like you.
People are my business. They're my
business because I've made them my
business. Yeah, I talk too much.
I also listen too much. You can be
a cold-hearted cynic. I don't care.
Think what you want about me. I'm
not changing. I like me. My wife
likes me. My customers like me.
Because I'm the real article. I'm a
human being. Flaws, fat and farts.
I'm flesh and blood.

C.U. NEAL
He feels like the last slice of a loaf of bread.

C.U. DEL
He's serious and genuine.
 41.

INT. ROOM
Neal closes the door and walks back to the bed. He steps out
of his pants and gets in bed. He turns out the light. Del
slips back into bed. They both settle in.
NEAL
Sorry.
DEL
(after a long pause)
So am I .
NEAL
Night.
DEL
Sleep tight.

INT. HALLWAY
The pizza boy's still hanging around. He puts his ear to
the door and listens. He reaches into his back pocket and
withdraws a room key.

EXT. HOTEL - MORNING

it's even uglier in the daylight. In the middle of nothing.

INT. BEDROOM- C.U. DEL AND NEAL

•
Sleeping. Tight ·as spoons. Del has his arm around Neal's
chest. Neal's holding Del's hand. Del's face is in the crook
of Neal's neck. Nestled tight and warm. They're both
sleeping sweet and satisfied. Del snuggles and nibbles Neal's
earlobe with his dry lips. Neal smiles in his sleep. A beat
and the smile relaxes. Somewhere in his unconscious mind, he
senses something's not right. Another beat and Neal opens his
eyes. He thinks for a moment. He slowly brings Del's hand up
to his face and looks at it. Del's eyes open. He looks
around, orients himself. He knows something's terribly wrong.
DEL
Neal?
NEAL
Del?
DEL
Why are you holding my hand?
 42.

NEAL
Why did you kiss my ear?
DEL
I don't know.

NEAL
Where's your other hand?

DEL
(worried)
I'm not sure.
NEAL
Find it, Del!
Del thinks another beat. His hand emerges from under Neal's
pillow.

NEAL
On the count of three. One ..•

DEL
Two •••

NEAL AND DEL

THREE!

INT. ROOM

Del and Neal burst out of the bed, screaming and shivering
with revulsion.

INT. COFFEE SHOP

Del and Neal are eating breakfast.

DEL
The airlines are lying. While you
were in the shower, I watched a
little "Today Show" and Willard
Scott said it's still snowing in
Chicago. If they told you flights
are going out to Chicago, they're
~rying to sell you a seat.
NEAL
I'll go wait it out.
DEL
You want to be in Chicago by
tonight?
 43.

NEAL
At the outside.
DEL
That's a stretch. I think if you
plan on tomorrow morning you're
still tugging your tamale.
NEAL
I'm not spending Thanksgiving in
Wichita.
DEL
Worse things have happened. Ask any
wartime resident of Dresden.
NEAL
That's not fair. I got a family
waiting for me to come home.
DEL
You and everybody else.
NEAL
I'm home tomorrow come hell or high
water.
DEL
Which do you prefer? I'm going with
the high water myself. If you think
the airliner gives two craps and
doorbell chimes if you eat turkey
with your family tomorrow, you're
deluded.
NEAL
That's a switch. You're the biggest
humanist.
DEL
I'm also a realist. You want to get
home?
NEAL
I want and I will get home.
DEL
Not on an airplane. If it stops
snowing right now, O'Hare'll take a
good five or six hours to get into
operation. Then there's 24 hours of
air traffic backed-up. Anyway you
slice it, the odds are you and me
are eating turkey right here.
 44.

An anorexic WAITRESS cruises by, refills their coffee cups and

drops off the check.
DEL
If we wait for a flight.
NEAL
How the hell else will we get home?

DEL
I've got a buddy at Amtrak.
NEAL
Train?
DEL
Why the hell not?

Neal shrugs. He smiles.

DEL
I'm sure everything's booked solid.
·But I'm pretty elose to this guy.
NEAL
Sold him his shower curtain rings?
DEL
On every damn train.
Del grabs the check. Neal snat~hes it away from him.

NEAL
I've paid for everything else, why
break precedent.
DEL
Hey, I'm starting to feel like a
freeloader here.
NEAL
You get me on the train and you're
no freeloader.
DEL
We'll get a sleeper and you can hold
my hand again.
Neal laughs. He reaches for his wallet and opens it. It's
empty. His laughter ends abruptly. He looks angrily at Del.

DEL
What?
 45.

NEAL
You know goddamn well, what!
DEL
I'm sorry, I don't.
Neal shows him his empty wallet.

NEAL
I had seven hundred dollars in
here!
DEL
I don't have your dough, Neal. I'm
alot of things but I'm not a thief.
NEAL
You went through my stuff last
night, didn't you? Huh?
DEL
I didn't touch your money! And I
don't care for the accusation.
NEAL
Well, I had seven hundred dollars in
here. You went into it for the
pizza. Maybe you ...
Del digs his hand into his back pocket and whips out his
fat, worn, brown leather wallet. He slaps it on the table.
DEL
Count it!
NEAL
Like you'd keep it in your wallet if
you stole it.
DEL
There's two hundred and sixty-three
dollars in there. If there's a
dollar more you can call me a thief.
NEAL
That doesn't prove a damn thing!
DEL
Count itl
Neal picks up the wallet and opens it. He looks in the money
section.
 46.

DEL
Two hundred and sixty-three ••.
NEAL
It's empty.
DEL
Doll .•• huh?
NEAL
Dry.
Del grabs the wallet from him. He looks in it. He glares at
Neal.
DEL
Where is it?
NEAL
I'm looking for mine!
DEL
Well, now mine's gone!
NEAL
I'm out seven hundred and you're
out ...
DEL
Two hundred and sixty-three dollars.
They look at each other for a long beat.
NEAL
You swear you didn't lift my dough?
DEL
You didn't life mine?
NEAL
I didn't touch yours.
DEL
I did~•t touch yours.
NEAL
Where is it?
DEL
Could we have been robbed?
NEAL
By who?
 47.

DEL
Did you lock the door when you came
back to bed?
NEAL
It's always locked.

DEL
The chin-lock?
Neal thinks. He shakes his head.
NEAL
I don't think so.

DEL
We had a visitor.
NEAL
Oh, Jesus.
DEL
Do you have any money?
Neal reaches in his pocket. He takes out a few crumpled bills
and some change. Del reaches in his pocket. He comes up with
a dollar. Neal looks at the check.
NEAL
Six fifty.
Del counts out the money. He calls the waitress over.
DEL
Hon? You charged us for bacon?

She looks at the check.

WAITRESS
Yeah.
DEL
We didn't get it.
WAITRESS
Sure you did.

DEL
If we got it, we'd have bacon on our
breath. Right?
WAITRESS
I don't know.
 48.

DEL
Of course we would. Bend over and
take a whiff.
The waitress rears back.
WAITRESS
No way.
DEL
We're not paying for something we
didn't get. It's your word against
our word and our breath. Just take
a whiff. Neal?
Neal looks at him curiously. Del opens his mouth. Neal
follows suit. The waitress clucks her tongue and yanks the
check off the table.
WAITRESS
I know I brought your bacon because
two slices fell off and I remember
putting them back on the plate.
DEL
Well, honey, I'm with the agricul-
ture department and I think you'd
rather tell your boss you made a
mistake on our bill than have me
tell !!!Y boss you serve dirty bacon.
She quickly scratches off the bacon and retotals.
DEL
And for your information and
edification, you know what that
means?
WAITRESS
No.
DEL
You look it up when you get home.
We didn't get our bacon. Somebody
else must have gotten it and you
better hope they don't catch
something and die.
The waitress puts the check down on the table.
DEL
Alright, let's address the hair in
the orange juice.
She picks up the check and tears it in two.
 49.

EXT. MOTEL
Del and Neal are sitting on Del's trunk in front of the motel.

EXT. MOTEL - DEL AND NEAL

They're chatting, waiting.
DEL
What'd your wife say?
NEAL
She thinks I'm crazy.
DEL
That goes with the territory.
NEAL
Yeah.
DEL
Fortunately we're dealing with a
small time crook. He didn't bother
with the credit cards. We'll charge
our way home. What kind of plastic
do you carry?
NEAL
American Express, Mastercharge,
Visa, oil cards, Diner's Club.
What do you carry?
DEL
Sears, J.C. Penney, AAA.
NEAL
No bank cards?
DEL
I try to deal in cash.
NEAL
In light of what happened I imagine
you'll rethink that one.
DEL
I don't make a habit of leaving the
door unlocked. You have any checks?
NEAL
My wife keeps the checkbook. You?
 so.

DEL
Strictly cash. I travel too much to
write checks. 99% of them would be
out of state and an out of state
check is about as welcome as a
priest in a whorehouse.
NEAL
You get us to the train station,
I'll take care of everything else.
DEL
Gus said he'd call his son down to
give us a lift.
Del looks at his watch.
DEL
He should have been here.
NEAL
Why didn't you just borrow some
dough from Gus?
DEL
He doesn't have a pot to piss in.
I can't take money from him.
NEAL
You could wire it to him.
DEL
I have a long standing policy
against borrowing money from
friends.
NEAL
But it's okay to borrow from
strangers like me, huh?
DEL
It's incentive for you to become a
friend.

EXT, _MOTEL
An old pick-up truck pulls up in front of the motel and blows
its- horn.

NEAL AND DEL

They look at the truck, then at each other.
 51.

NEAL
Is that him?
Del calls to the driver.
DEL
Are you Gus's son?

HIS POV
A strange, gangly young man, OWEN, looks out the truck at him.
Beside him is a TWO-YEAR-OLDstanding on the seat and his WIFE
with a BABY in her arms.
OWEN
I'm Owen. You the shower curtain
ring fella?

EXT. MOTEL
Del and Neal get up from the trunk.
DEL
That's me, Del Griffith and this is
Neal Page.
OWEN
Pleased to meet you both. This is
my kid and that's my wife and that's
my baby.
Neal and Del nod to the wife.
OWEN
You don't gotta say nothin' to her.
She's dumb as a melon and she don't
remember nothin'. I'm to drive you
to Wichita to catch the Amtrak?
DEL
Yeah. I really appreciate it.
He and Neal stoop to lift the trunk.
OWEN
Don't bother with that.
He turns and barks at the wife.
OWEN
Get out there and put that trunk in
the back!
 52.

Neal and Del quickly intercede.

NEAL
We got it.
OWEN
She don't mind. She's short and
skinny but she's strong.
DEL
No, no. We're fine.
They lift the trunk and hoist it into the trunk. Barely.
They quickly load the other things.
NEAL
We riding back here?
DEL
I guess.
NEAL
Do you know how much this suit cost?
OWEN
Come on up front!
(barks at the wife)
Get you and them kids in back so the
guests ride up here out of the cold.
The wife opens the door to get out. Del and Neal jump into
the truck.
NEAL
No problem. We're fine.
OWEN
She don't mind. She resists the
cold real good.
DEL
So do we and we love it! Let's go!
Owen throws the truck in gear and it lurches forward.

EXT. DOWNTOWN
WICHITA - TRAIN DEPOT
The truck pulls up at the depot. Del and Neal are frozen.
Their hair is standing on end. They slowly rise and step
down from the truck. Owen and his wife get out of the truck
and walk around to the back. Owen opens the gate. His
teensy wife picks up the trunk and carries it into the depot.
Del and Neal grab the other bags with frozen fingers.
 53.

EXT. DEPOT - TRAIN

Neal gives Del his ticket.
NEAL
They didn't have two together.
So •••

DEL
No problem.
Neal offers his hand. Del takes it.
NEAL
If I don't see you again, take care.
DEL
You too. But I'll probably see you
on the train.
NEAL
I'm going to sleep if I can. But
anyway, ·it's been kind of fun.
DEL
It was a laugh. Good luck to you.
And thanks. Oh! Shit! Give your
address so I can pay you back for
the ticket.
NEAL
The ticket's a gift.
DEL
Come on. Give me your address.
NEAL
Del, it's• gift.
DEL
Give me your phone number so at
least I can find out if you got
home okay.
NEAL
I'll get home okay. But thanks for
the concern. See ya, pal.
Neal pats Del on the back and boards the train. Del watcpes
him board. There's a little sadness. He misses Neal already.
He looks at his ticket and waddles down the siding. He boards
another car.
 54.

INT. THEIR CAR

Neal places his briefcase in the overhead baggage compartment
and sits down in the window seat. He settles into the seat.
He ~ighs with relief. Glad to be seated, glad to be headed
home. Glad to be rid of Del. Not in a mean way. Just glad
to be on his own, going back to his own life. He closes his
eyes.

EXT. COUNTRYSIDE
The Amtrak train flies down the tracks across the frosty
plains.

INT. TRAIN CAR

Neal's sleeping. His face is turned to the window. He stirs
and rolls his head to the other side. Right into the snoring
mug of Del Griffith. He opens his eyes and rears back. He
recovers from the iurprise and slumps in defeat. He shakes
his head and sighs. He can't shake the big dude. He leans
his head back and closes his eyes. There's a jolt. He opens
his eyes and looks out the window.

HIS POV
The countryside isn't flashing by the window as quickly as it
was before.

C.U. NEAL
Disappointment washes down all over his face.

HIS POV
The countryside isn't flashing past at all. The train's dead
on the tracks.

EXT. COUNTRYSIDE - TRAIN

Smoke's billowing out of the engine. A perplexed crew is
watching the fire.

EXT. JEFFERSON CITY, MISSOURI

The Missouri capital.
 55.

EXT. BUS DEPOT

The Greyhound main terminal.

INT. BUS DEPOT

Del and Neal are sitting on benches in the seedy terminal.

DEL AND NEAL

Del looks at Neal. Neal's bubbling with anger. He looks at
his watch. Del looks at him.
DEL
It's not my fault the train caught
on fire.
Neal looks at him. He's not so sure.
DEL
Thank your lucky stars it didn't
derail. They derail more often
than they catch fire.
NEAL
It's three fifteen.
DEL
The bus leaves at four. We' re
alright. We'll get into Chicago
late tonight. You worry too much.
Have you ever thought of going with
the flow?
NEAL
I am going with the flow and you're
what floated into my life.
DEL
If it weren't for me, Mr. Ungrateful,
you'd still be at the Wichita airport.
NEAL
Instead I'm in the Jefferson City
bus terminal. Tell. me how that's an
improvement?
DEL
You're a couple hundred miles closer
to home.
 56.

NEAL
And I'm out seven hundred bucks
cash, two hundred in train
tickets •••
DEL
They're mailing you a refund.
NEAL
Alot of good that does us here.
DEL
You're in a pretty lousy mood, huh?
NEAL
To say the least.
DEL
You ever traveled by bus?
Neal shakes his head, no.
DEL
Your mood's probably not going to
improve much.

INT. BUS
Jammed with cut-rate passengers. Screaming BABIES, luggage
everywhere, food wrappers, a dozen SERVICEMENwith their
Walkman's leaking twelve different songs. CHILDREN cruising
the aisles. The engine is ROARING. Someone has a window
open. It's hell on wheels.

DEL AND NEAL

They're toward the back. Neal has a seat in his lap. The
person in front of him has the seat all the way back and is
sleeping. Del's eating popcorn. Neal's staring out the
filthy window. Del pokes Neal. Neal looks at him. Del
jerks his head toward the seats opposite them. Neal looks.

HIS POV
A sleazy, young couple are furiously necking in the seats.
His hands are all over her. Inside her clothes, outside her
clothes, squeezing, rubbing, stroking.

DEL AND NEAL

They're both watching.
 57.

DEL
Beats a movie, huh?
Neal stares at him.
DEL
Beggars can't be choosers, Neal.
It's better than walking.
NEAL
Barely.
DEL
Don't get your jugs in a twist.
A child's hand squeezes between Del and Neal's seats and
fishes around.
DEL
This is probably as good a time as
any to tell you something.
Neal leans back to avoid the child's dirty, probing fingers.
NEAL
What now?
DEL
You'll probably be relieved. Seeing
as how you're not enjoying bus
travel.
NEAL
(suspicious)
What?
DEL
Our tickets are only good to St.
Louis.
Neal's jaw drops.
DEL
St. Louis into Chi is booked
tighter than Tom Thumb's ass.
It's Thanksgiving.

C.U. PHOTOGRAPH
A picture of a turkey dinner. We MOVE OFF the photo and up to
Neal. He's on the phone.
 58.

NEAL
I'm in St. Louis. Why? Because
I've always wanted to tour the
Anheiser-Busch Brewery. Come on,
Sue.
(pause)
I'm sorry. It's been hell. I got
hooked-up with this shower ring
salesman. I told you about him
last night. Every time I listen
to him .•.
(pause)
Why do I listen to him? Good
question. I'm stuck. No money.
Everything's booked-up. I'm in the
bus station. I'm tired and hungry
and I'm mad.
(pause)
I want to get home. I can't fly in.
I've tried every airline. There
isn't a seat left on anything. This
is the busiest travel day of the
year.
Neal turns into the terminal.

HIS POV
Del's talking with a group of kids.

NEAL
He turns back to the booth.
NEAL
I think I'll just rent a car and
drive home. It's about eight hours.
Honey, I can drive alone. I'm not
that tired. I'm not driving home
with Del. I don't care if he can
share the driving, if I have him
along, something'll go wrong. I
know it. I don't trust him an inch.

INT. TERMINAL - DEL

He's talking with the kids.
DEL
You don't know what an AT&T calling
card is? Where have you been? You
go to school?
 59.

KID
No.
DEL
You can call anywhere in the world
with it.
KID
So?
DEL
Free. Long distance calls for free.
You don't see the value of something
like that?
KID
No.

NEAL
He wraps up his conversation.
NEAL
Tell the kids that I'll be home.
I'll be fine. Don't worry about a
thing. I'll call next chance I get.
Huh? I called collect because I
lost my AT&T card. Whoever took my
money must have taken the calling
card and my Visa.

INT. TERMINAL - DEL

He's still hawking the kids.
DEL
The Visa card's gonna cost you
double the calling card.
KID
I don't have a hundred bucks.
DEL
What kind of delinquen_t are you?
Small timer. Real small time. I
thought you were a heavy hitter.
KID
I got seventy-five.
DEL
Sold.
 60.

INT. BUS STATION RESTAURANT

Del and Neal are eating lunch.
DEL
That watch belonged to my father and
his father before him. You want to
feel hurt, sell a family heirloom
for seventy-five beans.
NEAL
You didn't have to sell it.
DEL
I've steered you wrong so many
times, I felt like a shit burger on
a steak bun. The least I could do
was scrape up a nice meal for you.
NEAL
Thanks.
DEL
How's the wife?
NEAL
Fine.
DEL
Kids miss their Daddy?
Neal smiles.
DEL
I called an old friend at Eastern
Airlines. He says the chances of
getting a flight into Chicago from
here are about the same as a mouse
sexually satisfying a black rhino.
NEAL
I know. I called all the airlines.
DEL
Did you call your office? Maybe
they have some clout. You have a
company plane?
NEAL
No. The office closed at noon.
DEL
I have some friends in town. We
could probably ...
 61.

Neal lays the news on Del.

NEAL
I've been thinking, Del.
DEL
That's good. This country was built
on man's thoughts.
NEAL
When we put our heads together we
get nowhere. I think I'm holding
you up.
DEL
I'm enjoying your company. You're
not that bad. You don't react to
crisis very well, but I can overlook
that. You have plenty of other
admirable traits.
NEAL
I think we'd probably both get home
alot sooner if we split up.
Del's face drops. He's hurt. He's enjoying the adventure.
NEAL
One can go faster than two. You
have friends here. They'll probably
be much more inclined to help you
alone than help the two of us.
DEL
Not necessarily. They're good
people.
NEAL
Why risk it? We'll go alot faster
working as singles.
DEL
You really think so?
NEAL
Yeah.
Del looks down at his plate.
DEL
Okay.
There's a long pause.
 62.

DEL
I'm a pain in the ass in other
words.
NEAL
No, not at all, Del.
DEL
Yeah, I am. Everything I touch
turns to shit. This isn't the first
time. My mother used to tell me I
had twice as much heart as brain.

He looks up at Neal.
DEL
I was only trying to help.
NEAL
I know, Del. And I appreciate it.
Del drops his napkin on his plate. He looks at the check,
lays down the appropriate sum plus tip. He counts out half
the remaining money and puts it in his pocket. He gets up and
stuffs the other half in Neal's suitcoat pocket. He pats him
on the shoulder.
NEAL
I can't take your money.
DEL
Take it. Buy the kids a chocolate
turkey. Tell them it's from an old
huckster. Good luck, pal.
He shuffles out of the restaurant. Neal watches him go.
A sad smile.

EXT. ST. LOUIS AIRPORT

Jammed with activity.

INT. AIRPORT - RENTAL CAR COUNTER

It's jammed with people. Huge lines. Deafening din. Neal's
at the counter filling out the forms.

EXT. AIRPORT - ARRIVAL AREA

Neal's at the curb with a group of people waiting for the
courtesy bus. For the first time since the GM building,
 63.

he's smiling. He's so light in spirit, he strikes up a

conversation with a frail, young man next to him.
NEAL
(to the man next to him)
You have no idea what I've been
through to get to this point.
MAN
You have no idea what I've been
through.
NEAL
It can't come close to what I've
been through.
MAN
I had my foot amputated on Thursday.
Neal is shocked.
MAN
I left the hospital in New York to
go to Chicago to be with my sister
and we got waylayed to Wichita, I
got on Amtrak, the train caught
fire. I hitchhiked to St. Louis,
went to the bus terminal to try
to take the bus to Chicago, I
discovered along the way somebody's
picked my pocket, lifted my wallet.
All I had was eighty dollars, I
bought a Visa card off a kid in the
terminal and illegally used it to
rent a car.
NEAL
Other than that, you looking forward
to the holiday?
MAN
Oh, very much so.

INT. COURTESYBUS
One of those vans with the sofas and lamps. It's packed with
weary travelers. Neal included. He's squeezed in between two
nuns. The van jerks to a stop. A BURLYBLACK DRIVER calls
out Neal's name.
DRIVER
Mr. Page?
 64.

Neal gets up and squishes his way up to the front. The driver
hands Neal his rental agreement envelope and a set of keys.
DRIVER
Red Mustang. Space E-67.
NEAL
Thanks. Have a nice holiday.
DRIVER
Are you kidding? I'm working. You
have a nice holiday. I'll be rigE't
here. You know what holiday I got
off this year? Yorn Kippur. I ate
bagels and watched "I Dream of
Jeanie."
NEAL
Well, have a nice day.
DRIVER
Impossible. These days, it's
impossible.
He sits down and opens the door. Neal steps down off the van.

EXT. PARKING LOT

The van pulls away. Neal looks at the envelope. He turns and
scans the lot.

HIS POV
No Red Mustang in sight.

NEAL
He looks at the keys. Looks up. Looks at the pavement.

HIS POV
In big, white letters, D-67.

NEAL
He walks down the row of cars, looking at the space numbers .
.He stops at an empty space.
 65.

C.U. PAVEMENT
It's E-67. No Red Mustang. No nothing.

EXT. PARKING LOT

Neal stands in the empty space looking at the keys and the
rental agreement.
NEAL
son of a bitch •..
He looks down the long parking lot aisle.

HIS POV
The van disappears down the lane. Stops. Discharges
passengers. Turns and heads down another aisle.

NEAL
He takes off down the aisle.
NEAL
HEY!

EXT. VAN
The last passenger gets off. The doors close and the van
pulls out. As it pulls out, we see Neal, breathless and
exhausted make a last futile attempt to catch the van.
He stops.

EXT. HIGHWAY
The van turns onto the highway leading back to the airport.

EXT, PARKING LOT

Neal drops his two-suiter.
NEAL
SHIT! YAAA!

INT. AIRPORT
The doors open and Neal shuffles in. He's frozen. His pant
legs are soaked with road spray. His coat's splattered with
 66.

mud. He's blue in the face. He's dragging the two-suiter.

His shoes are saturated and covered with salt stains. He has
his necktie wrapped around his head to keep his ears warm.

INT. AIRPORT - RENTAL CAR COUNTER

Neal trudges up to the counter. A perky young AGENT finishes
her last task and looks up at Neal with a big, friendly, TV ad
smile. The smile dissolves as she studies him.

C.U. NEAL
He looks crazed, frozen, wild and mad as hell.

C.U. AGENT
She manages a fresh smile. Less enthusiastic.
AGENT
May I help you?

C.U. NEAL
He leans forward. Talks very softly.
NEAL
Yes.

C.U. AGENT
She leans forward to hear better.
AGENT
(softly)
How?

NEAL AND THE AGENT

He leans a little closer.
NEAL
You can start by w1p1ng that fucking
dumb-ass smile off your rosy fuckin'
cheeks. Then you can drop the Miss
fuckin' Cheerful bullcrap and give
me a fuckin' automobile.
The Agent freezes.
 67.

NEAL
A fuckin' Mustang, a fuckin' Toyota,
a fuckin' Datsun, a fuckin' Chevy,
four fuckin' wheels and a seat!
AGENT
I don't really care for the way
you're talking to me.
NEAL
I don't really care for the way your
fuckin' company left me out in the
middle of fuckin' nowhere with
fuckin' keys to a fuckin' car that
isn't fuckin' there .. And I didn't
really care to fuckin' walk down a
fuckin' highway and across a fuckin'
runway to get back here to have you
smile in my fuckin' face. I'm a
nice man under normal circumstances
and I have nothing against you
except your happy demeanor too
violently illustrates to me how
miserable I am. I want a car.
AGENT
Can I see your rental agreement?
NEAL
No.
AGENT
Why not?
NEAL
It blew away.
AGENT
Oh, boy.
NEAL
Oh, boy, what?
AGENT
You're fucked.

EXT. AIRPORT - ARRIVAL AREA

Neal trudges out of the airport. His eyes are glazed, he's
beyond anger. He walks zombie-like to a cab stand. A burly
dispatcher addresses him.
DISPATCHER
Where you goin'?
 68,

NEAL
Chicago.
The dispatcher pauses.
DISPATCHER
Chicago?
NEAL
Chicago.
DISPATCHER
Do you know you're in St. Louis?
NEAL
Yeah. And I want to be in Chicago.
That's why I'm talking to you.
DISPATCHER
You want to take a cab to Chicago?
NEAL
Yes, I do. Can you help me or are
you going to be like everybody else
I've been running into lately?
DISPATCHER
I can't send a cab to Chicago.
NEAL
Do you know someone who can?
DISPATCHER
Did you try the airlines? They go
to Chicago all the time.
NEAL
If I wanted to joke, I'd follow you
into the john and watch you take a
leak.
The dispatcher glares at Neal.
DISPATCHER
If I gotta look at you for anymore
than two seconds, you're gonna be
lookin' at me upside down and
blurry. -
NEAL
All I asked for was a cab. It is
possible for a taxi to transport me
to Chicago. I'm prepared to pay
whatever the meter says plus tip.
(MORE)
 69.

NEAL (Cont'd)
I'd much prefer to fly or drive
myself but due to holiday traffic,
neither of those options are avail-
able to me. Can you help me or are
you going to stand there like a slab
of meat with mittens?

C.U. DISPATCHER
He doesn't much care for Neal's attitude.
DISPATCHER
Time's up.

C.U. NEAL
Doesn't understand.
NEAL
Excuse me?

C.U. DISPATCHER
He draws his fist back.
DISPATCHER
You're excused.
He throws a fist enclosed in leather directly into CAMERA.

C.U. NEAL
he drops backwards OUT OF FRAME.

EXT. STREET
Neal falls into the street. Lands on his ass in front of a
car. The contents of his briefcase go flying. He screams and
covers his head. The car skids to a stop, inches from Neal's
body. Horns blow, tires screech.

C.U. NEAL
Hands over his face. He slowly removes them.
 70.

HIS POV
Del Griffith is over him, looking down. He's startled.
DEL
Neal?

c.u. NEAL
He's equally startled.
NEAL
Del?

C.U. DEL
He's relieved to find Neal's alright.
DEL
If I'd had my sunglasses on, I might
have run you over.

INT. CAR LATER

Del's driving. Neal's next to him. He's cleaning off his
face with a handkerchief.
DEL
I had a feeling when we parted ways
that somehow, someday, our paths
would cross.
NEAL
Me, too.
DEL
Do you have any idea how glad I am
that I didn't kill you?
NEAL
Do you have any idea how disappointed
I am that you didn't kill me?
DEL
Hey, now. Chin up, buddy. We're
sailing. You remember what I said
about you have to go with the flow a
little more? I still stand by it.
 71.

NEAL
How do I go with the flow when the
rental car agency leaves me in a
hundred acre parking lot with keys
to a car that isn't there and I have
to walk three miles back to find out
they don't have any cars?
DEL
I got a car. I didn't have to walk.
I didn't have to waste one drop of
sweat.
NEAL
You're lucky.
DEL
No, I just go with the flow. Cute
little gal at the rental counter
told me they were out of cars. I
gave her a set of shower curtain
rings and a compliment on her rosy
little cheeks and sweet smile and
bing! I'm behind the wheel of a
Lincoln at the price of a Datsun.
NEAL
You're a charmed man.
DEL
Nope.
NEAL
You just go with the flow.
DEL
Like a twig on the shoulders of a
mighty stream.
He puts his arm up on the seat and puts the hammer down.

EXT. HIGHWAY
A massive green Lincoln speeds past. Del's steamer trunk is
hanging out the back of the car trunk which is secured with a
length of twine.

EXT. GAS STATION - LATER

The Lincoln's at the pump. Del and Neal are out of the car.
Del's stretching.
 72.

DEL
You want to take over for awhile?
NEAL
You've only been driving half an
hour.
DEL
You haven't driven at all.
NEAL
I don't care. Fine.
DEL
My back's bothering me. I'd
appreciate it.
The attendant returns the hose and caps the tank.
ATTENDANT
Thirty-eight fifty.
Del looks at Neal to say he doesn't have the funds.
DEL
We better pool our cash for chow.
I don't have an oil card. Do you
mind?
Neal shakes his head, fishes out his wallet and gives the
attendant his credit card. He shuffles into the station.
DEL
I estimate our arrival time around
four A,M. Unless you want to stop
and get some sleep. I think we
could both use it.
DEL
I'd rather sleep in my own bed,
thank you.
DEL
It's not safe pushing yourself on
the highway. You caught a punch in
the hooter, you got your dander up,
you're anxious, you're in a hurry.
A highway safety expert will tell
you that that's a classic blue print
for a wreck.
NEAL
I'm fine.
 73.

DEL
We won't have a problem getting a
room on this stretch of road. This
has been a hell of a day, Neal.
NEAL
I'm getting home tonight. With or
without you.
DEL
Without me you won't do well. Face
the facts. You're probably a
brilliant theoretical man but from
what I can observe, you have no
technique. That's not a criticism.
Robert Oppenheimer, the father of
the A-bomb had to have Edward Teller
tie his shoes. Or so I'm told.
NEAL
I'm in good shape. Don't bother
about me.
The attendant returns with the credit card and slip. Neal
takes the greasy pen and signs his name.
DEL
I do worry about you because I care
about you.
NEAL
If you cared about me, you would
have left me alone in.Wichita.
Neal takes his card and walks around to the driver's side.
Del's staring at him.
DEL
If I'd left you in Wichita, you'd
still be in Wichita.
Neal gives him a look and gets in the car. Del opens the
door.
DEL
Before we pull out, do you want to
call the wife?
(pause)
I just asked.
He gets in and closes the door. Neal starts the car and pulls
out.
 74.

INT. CAR - LATER

Neal's driving. Del's trying to get comfortable. He's
running through the electric seat positions. It's annoying
the hell out of Nea·1.
NEAL·
Could you please not do that with
the seat? It's bugging me.
DEL
Once you start screwing around with
thes~ damn things, you can't ever
get comfortable.
NEAL
Then quit screwing around with it.

DEL
I gotta get comfortable. Do you
have a bad back?

Neal doesn't answer.

DEL
Well, I do and it hurts like a
bugger. There's a couple good
positions for it •••
He raises the seat bottom and lowers the seat back. The
motors grind and squeal.
NEAL
You wanna break it?
DEL
I'm not breaking it.

NEAL
Will you please knock it off?
A couple more tries and ~e gets the seat the way he wants it.
DEL
There.
NEAL
You done?
DEL
Almost.
NEAL
Now what?
 75.

DEL
I can't reach my feet to take off my
shoes.
NEAL
That's just fine. Leave your shoes
on.
DEL
I can't rest with my shoes on.
NEAL
Your feet smell. Leave the shoes
on.
DEL
When did you smell my feet?
NEAL
In the airport. Why is it that
everything you do bothers me?
DEL
I don't know. It could be you.
NEAL
we have another six or seven hours
together. Why can't you just
cooperate with me?
DEL
Can I loosen them?
·Neal sighs.

NEAL
Be my guest.
Del pushes the chair button. The motor grinds as he rises
forward. He loosens his shoes. He pushes the button again
and returns to his position. A few more squirts and he's got
it just right.
DEL
You know there're things you do that
bug me.
NEAL
Oh, really? Like what?
DEL
You play with your balls alot.
Neal looks at him. A long stare. Back to the road, back to
Del.
 76.

DEL
It's true.
NEAL
I don't play with my balls.
DEL
Yes, you do. It's like you're
afraid they're gone. You check them
a good five, six times an hour.

NEAL
You want to start a fight?
DEL
No. I'm just stating a fact. You
fiddle with your nuts alot.
NEAL
I've been wearing the same shorts
for two days. They're stretched
out.
DEL
That's a good explanation.
NEAL
It's good because it's true.
DEL
Okay.
He closes his eyes.

DEL
Do loose shorts also make you pick.
your rump?
Neal doesn't look at Del. He puts his foot down. The car
thunders ahead.

EXT. HIGHWAY
The car powers past.

INT. CAR - LATER

Neal's driving. Del's sound asleep. Snoring. Neal turns up
the music to mask the snoring. The snoring gets louder. Neal
turns the music up louder. The snoring goes louder. Neal
turns the music full blast. He looks at Del. Sleeping like
a baby.
 77.

NEAL
Del?
No response. He reaches for the electric window buttons. He
opens Del's window. Wind whips in. Del doesn't stir. Neal
puts down the other windows. No response from Del.
NEAL
DEL! GRIFFITH! ASSHOLE! LOUD-
MOUTHMORON,BUTTHEAD, FAG-BREATH
JERK! CHICKEN PICKER! GEEK! DEL!
He reaches over and pokes him. He stirs, turns away and
closes his mouth. He stops snoring. Neal puts the windows
back up. He turns off the radio. Nothing out of Del. He
reaches into his lap and adjusts his crotch.
DEL
Can't leave the walnuts alone, huh?
Neal freezes.

EXT. ROADSIDE CAFE

A greasy, little dump dwarfed by the giant rigs and the
Lincoln.

INT. CAFE
Del and Neal are finishing their. coffee.
DEL
If you·want I'll drive for awhile.
NEAL
That's generous of you considering
I've driven all day.
DEL
An hour behind the wheel with my
back is like a lifetime for you.
Neal grows weary of the bickering. He changes the subject.
To what's really bothering him.
NEAL
I can't believe it's Thanksgiving
eve and I'm not home with my family.
DEL
Yeah.
 78.

NEAL
You never said anything. Do you
have a family?
DEL
Oh, yeah. I'm a big family man.
You saw the picture of my wife.
NEAL
Kids?
DEL
Three. Two boys and a girl.
NEAL
I saw your wife. You got pictures
of the kids?
DEL
In my trunk •
.NEAL
It's hard being away, isn't it?
DEL
The misery. The absolute misery of
it.
NEAL
We'll be home soon enough.
DEL
Yeah. Let's roll.
They get up from the table and cross to the cash register.
The door opens and a TRUCKERwalks in.
TRUCKER
(general announcement)
Anybody headed north, think twice.
Big front moving down. Chicago's
history.
He crosses to the counter. Del looks at Neal. Then at the
CASHIER.
DEL
What's the motel situation?
CASHIER
Pretty good. Ethyl's Motor Mattress
always has an open bed or two.
 79.

NEAL
Del, forget it. We'll take it easy.
It'll be fine. Pay the lady.
DEL
Do you take credit cards?
CASHIER
Diner's Club, Visa, Mastercharge •••
Del pats Neal on the back. I'll be out front.

EXT. RESTAURANT- LATER

Del's in the car. The motor's running. Neal comes out and
gets in the car. Del guns the engine and whips the Lincoln
out of the parking space. Grinds to a stop, throws it in
forward and squeals out.

INT. CAR
Del's barreling down the road. Neal's laying down, trying to
get the seat up.
DEL
I really think we're pressing our
luck driving into the teeth of a
snow storm.
NEAL
You broke the seat! You broke the
goddamn seat!
The motor whinnies as Neal holds his finger on the button.
DEL
It was fine when I got out.
NEAL
You messed around with it until you
broke it!
DEL
You want to drive?
NEAL
No, I don't. Why did you have to do
this?
DEL
I can't be held responsible for
faulty engineering.
 BO.

NEAL
This is great. Very comfortable.
Neal crosses his arms on his chest as he lays practically
falls on his back in the broken seat.
DEL
You like country music?
NEAL
Hate it.
DEL
Is the rule whoever drives programs
the music?
NEAL
Not if you're putting on a country
station.
DEL
Boy, you sure like to play the boy
prince of France don't you?
NEAL
I'm not riding in a broken seat
listening to country music.
DEL
I listened to your rock •n• roll
shit. •
NEAL
I'm not going to argue with you.
Put on whatever you like. I'm going
to sleep.
Del flips on the radio and starts scanning the dial. Two
second bursts of music and talk. Up and down the FM band.
He hits the_AM band and travels it up and down.
NEAL
Find the goddamn station!
DEL
I'm sorry I don't have the worldwide
radio network committed to memory.
He flips
: ... ,·-:· .. , ...'. .. ·..·:, .;.·•:\·. _: ·..· .:·-.·:. ,,
back to FM.
_ :.:,-. ·.•·•,'•,; ·. ,/

NEAL
Aw, come on!
Del turns off the radio.
 81.

NEAL
What?
DEL
Forget it. You're such a miserable
asshole, I don't want to aggravate
you anymore than you already are.
NEAL
I'm not miserable. Turn on the
radio and find your station.
DEL
Forget it. I'm not in the mood for
music anymore.
NEAL
Fine.
DEL
I was. But you ruined it.
NEAL
Sorry.
DEL
No problem. I'll just consult with
you from now on about how you want
me to behave so that you'll be most.
comfortable. After all, I only
rented the car. You're the
passenger.
NEAL
Put on the radio.
DEL
Forget it.
NEAL
No, put it on.
DEL
I'd rather not.
NEAL
Don't play games, Del. Put on the
radio.
Del doesn't react. Neal leans forward, does a sit up and
flips on the radio. He scans down the dial until he hears the·
plaintive howl of a steel guitar. He leans back.
DEL
Thanks, Neal.
 82.

NEAL
My pleasure.
He settles into the seat and closes his eyes. Del pushes the
cigarette lighter in. He reaches into his pocket and pulls
out a cigarette. The lighter pops and lights the smoke.
DEL
Does my smoke bother you?
NEAL
Not if you crack your window a
little.
Del presses the window button. He opens the window a crack.
DEL
Is that too noisy?
NEAL
Close it more or open it more.
NEAL
If I close it more, it'll be closed
completely.
He opens the window further. Cold wind rushes in.
DEL
I'll pump the heat, okay?
NEAL.
Fine.
Del blasts the heater fan. Double the noise. He turns up the
music above the rush of wind and roar of the fan~
DEL
Get a little shut-eye so you'll be
fresh for your shift.
NEAL
I'LL TRY.
Del shifts in his se·at, puffs his cigarette.

EXT. HIGHWAY
the Lincoln hurtles down the lonely interstate into the dark
of the approaching storm.
 83.

INT. CAR
Neal's fallen asleep. Del takes a last puff on the cigarette
and carefully slips it out the window. He flicks it away.

INT. CAR - BACKSEAT

The butt is sucked back in the window and lands on Neal's
two-suiter in the backseat. The window snaps shut.

INT. CAR
Del bobs his head to the music. He's getting heavily bored.
He taps the steering wheel to the beat. Flicks his brights on
and off to the beat. It's getting a little warm in the car.
He turns off the fan. Drives a bit further. Still too warm.
He looks at Neal. He's asleep. He doesn't want to open the
window for fear of waking him with the noise. He raises his
knees to the steering wheel and attempts to remove his coat.

EXT. HIGHWAY
The Lincoln from the front. It swerves a little to the left,
then back to the -right.

INT. CAR
Del has his arms around behind his back trying to get his arms
out of the sleeves. As he presses back in the seat, his foot
buries the accelerator.

C.U. PEDALS
The accelerator is on the floor.

EXT. HIGHWAY
The Lincoln screams past.

, INT. CAR
Del's steering with his knees, streaking down the highway.
He's struggling with his arms. He suddenly realizes that he
has a huge problem. He twists to the side.
 84.

C.U. DEL'S HANDS

In trying to take off his coat, he's managed to slip his hands
into the epaulets on the cuffs of his overcoat and has
effectively handcuffed himself.

INT. CAR
Del struggles to free his hands, driving with his knees.
Neal's asleep, oblivious to everything.

EXT. HIGHWAY
The Lincoln's roaring along. It glides across two lanes and
shoots up an exit ramp.

INT. CAR
Del rips his hands free, grabs the wheel and hits the brakes.
He slams his eyes shut and SCREAMS. The braking force throws
Neal and the seat back forward. The seat locks.

EXT. HIGHWAY
The Lincoln does a 180 and grinds to a halt in a cloud of tire
smoke. It comes to rest across the overpass road, pointing
toward the ramp it just came up. The engine shudders and
dies.

INT. CAR
Neal bends over with the locked seat back holding him doubled
over. Del is white as bone china. Speechless, pumped full of
adrenalin. Neal looks at him.
NEAL
What the hell are you doing?
Del looks at him. Executes a quick recovery.
DEL
You almost had venison in your lap.
The biggest fuckin• deer I ever saw.
At least a ten point buck. Standing
in the middle of the highway looking
at me like I was a doe in heat.
Neal stares at him.
 85.

DEL
If I hit it, we'd be cheese. Go
back to sleep. We're making good•
time.
NEAL
I'm stuck.
DEL
Try the button.
Neal tries it. It just whines.
DEL
Keep your finger on it.
The motor continues to whine. Something catches. The back
moves to a normal position but the seat moves forward. Almost
to the dash. It stops.
DEL
You got a choice. Leave well enough
alone or risk a worse position.
Neal does nothing.
DEL
Good choice.
He starts the engine. Guns it. Huge backfire.
DEL
That wasn't me.
He drops it in gear.
DEL
Go back to sleep. Everything's
under control.

EXT. ROAD
The Lincoln lurches ahead and heads down the ramp it came up,
heading back onto the highway in the wrong direction.

INT. CAR
Neal slumps down in the seat. Del's wide awake. Alert as
a bunny. Neal closes his eyes.
 86.

C.U. BACKSEAT
The two-suiter's smoldering. The cigarette's burned a hole in
the bag and fallen into the clothes.

C.U. NEAL
He sniffs. Opens his eyes. Looks at Del.
NEAL
You took your shoes off.

C.U. DEL
He looks at Neal.
DEL
Not so. I'm wearing them.

INT. CAR
Neal sits up.
NEAL
What smells?
DEL
Tire rubber probably.
NEAL
Jeez. What a stink.
He settles back in. Del puts his arm up on the window and
starts to whistle.

INT. CAR - CROSS ANGLE

Across Del to Neal and out the passenger window. We see a car
riding alongside the Lincoln. It's across the median strip.
It's going the right direction. Del glances across. Sees the
car. Smiles. Puts a little more juice into it. The car
running_alongside him blows its horn. Del chuckles. He blows
his horn and puts the hammer down a little more. Neal sits up
and looks at Del.
NEAL
What?
DEL
Some joker wants to race.
 87.

He motions his head to the other car. It's horn is blaring.

Del lays on his horn and slams the accelerator to the floor.
Neal looks out the window.

HIS POV
A sedan is keeping pace across the grass strip dividing the
highway. The driver has his window down and is waving his arm
furiously.

INT. CAR - DEL

He's looking out the passenger window.
DEL
Is he waving to you? You know him?

C.U. NEAL
He's watching the car.

HIS POV
The car running alongside. The driver's screaming.

C.U. NEAL
He cups his hand to his ear.
NEAL
He wants something.

C. U. DEL
He shoots looks out the window.
DEL
Maybe he's drunk.

C.U. NEAL
He puts his window down.

L
 88.

HIS POV
The driver's screaming.

C.U. NEAL
He screams back.
NEAL
WHAT?!

HIS POV
The driver keeps screaming.

C.U. NEAL
He can't quite make out what the guy's screaming.
NEAL
WRONGWHAT?!

HIS POV
The driver continues hollering.

C.U. NEAL
He sticks his head ~ut the window.
NEAL
WHAT?!

HIS POV
The driver shrieks.

INT. CAR
Neal pulls his head back in the window. He looks at Del.
NEAL
He says we're going the wrong way.
DEL
He's drunk. How would he know where
we're going?
 89.

NEAL
Maybe he is dru ..•
Neal snaps his head around. Looks out the window.

HIS POV
•
The screaming driver. POV shifts down to the median strip.
The grassy ditch flying past.

C.U. NEAL
It hits him. His eyes bug-out. He snaps his head forward.

EXT. HIGHWAY - FURTHER AHEAD

A pair of ten-wheelers racing up a hill.

INT. CAR
Neal screams. Del looks at him. Snaps his head around to the
· front.

THEIR POV
Four huge, bright sets of headlights breaking the crest of the
hill.

C.U. DEL
Slams his eyes shut.

C.U. NEAL
Eyes frozen open their widest.

C.U. DEL'S FOOT

On the brake pedal. To the floor.

EXT. HIGHWAY
The trucks swerve apart to avoid the Lincoln. They're gone
in a flash. The force of the sudden stop sends the steamer
trunk hurtling forward. It rips the trunk lid off the car.
 90.

The steamer trunk and trunk lid sail over the car and skid
down the hill.

INT. CAR
The steering wheel's bent over. Del's hands are gripping it.
Neal's hands are embedded in the padded dash.
DEL
I think it's time for you to drive,
Neal.
Neal looks at him.
DEL
I'm getting a little tired. And now
my back really hurts.
Neal looks at his watch.
NEAL
If it wasn't Thanksgiving, I'd kill
you.
DEL
You don't mean that do you?
NEAL
Yes.

EXT. HIGHWAY
The Lincoln pulls slowly around to the side of the road and
comes to a stop pointing in the correct direction. The doors
open and Neal and Del get out. They walk around to the back
and look at the gaping hole in the back of the Lincoln.
DEL
We could make a jacuzzi out of it.
Neal looks at him. He isn't interested in jokes.
DEL
I'll get my trunk.
He heads down the road. He grabs his back, groans.
DEL
Oh, Jesus. My back!
He rubs the small of his back and continues.
 91.

C.U. NEAL
He sighs. He can't let Del drag the trunk back by himself.

EXT. HIGHWAY
Neal follows after Del. As he heads down the highway. we see
flames erupt in the backseat of the Lincoln.

EXT. HIGHWAY
Del hobbles toward the trunk. Neal's behind him. In the
background we see the interior of the car engulfed in flame.
Del stops at the trunk. He grabs one end and drags it to the
shoulder. Neal picks up the trunk lid. He carries it to the
shoulder and drops it on top of the trunk. He grabs an end.
Del grabs the other. They lift and turn to face the Lincoln.
They stop, drop the trunk.

THEIR POV
The ragtop of the Lincoln is on fire.

C.U. DEL
He can't figure why the car's burning.

C.U. NEAL
Complete mystification.

NEAL AND DEL

They watch the car turn.
NEAL
Why is the car on fire?
Del shakes his head.
DEL
I don't know.
NEAL
My suitcase is in the backseat.
DEL
So is your briefcase.
 92.

NEAL
And my wallet.
Del looks at Neal.
DEL
And your coat.
NEAL
I'll bet my left nut you did that
with one of your cigarettes.
DEL
I don't think so. I only had one.
I made sure I tossed it out.
NEAL
What I smelled before was the
backseat. Burning plastic. I'll
bet you threw the cigarette out and
it came back in.
DEL
I'm pretty careful. I doubt it.
What difference does it make?
NEAL
Good luck turning the car in.
They'll be happy as pigs in shit
to see you.
Del doesn't say anything. He looks at Neal out the corner of
his eye. Something occurs to Neal. He looks at Del.
DEL

NEAL
How could you rent a car without a
credit card?
Del doesn't know what to say.
NEAL
You couldn't. How'd you get the
car?
DEL
I gave the girl with the cute cheeks
a set of shower curtain rings.
NEAL
You don't rent a Lincoln on shower
curtain rings, Del.
 93.

Del knows he's caught.

DEL
What do you want me to say?
NEAL
Which card did you put it on?
DEL
Mastercharge.
NEAL
You stole my Kastercharge?
DEL
No.
NEAL
Then how'd you get it?
DEL
I borrowed it.
NEAL
You stole it!
DEL
I was going to send it back to you,
but you wouldn't give me your
address. I'm sorry. I was stuck.
·you ditched me. I had no money.
No cards.
NEAL
Give it back.
DEL
I can't.
NEAL
Why_not?
DEL
It's in the car.

EXT. HIGHWAY
The interior and the roof of the car is burning bright.

EXT. MOTEL
A chain motel. Big, bright sign. The charred Lincoln pulls
up in front. All that remains of the roof is a twisted
 94.

black frame. Neal's driving. He's wearing a big, ugly wool

overcoat and stocking cap. Del's wearing his overcoat and
a couple sweaters and a baseball cap.

INT. CAR
The interior is completely charred. They're sitting on bare,
burned springs.
DEL
Are you still mad at me?
Neal doesn't say a word.
DEL
You know, you could have killed me
slugging me in the stomach when I
wasn't ready.
NEAL
I'm sorry I failed.
Neal opens the door and gets out.
DEL
With all this fresh air, we're going
to sleep like babies.

INT. MOTEL
Neal walks into the motel. He looks like a patron of an
Anchorage resale shop. Del follows him in. Neal marches up
to the counter.
NEAL
I need one room.
DEL
If you're still pissed, maybe we
should get separate rooms.
NEAL
Get your own room.
The DESK CLERK slides a registration form across the counter.
Neal takes the pen and begins filling it in.
CLERK
I need a major credit card.
Neal reaches into his pocket and hands the clerk a charred,
melted hunk of plastic.
 95.

NEAL
You take American Express?
He reaches into his other pocket and comes up with another
melted wad.
NEAL
Mastercharge?
The clerk stares at the plastic. Neal finishes the form.
CLERK
These aren't credit cards.
NEAL
They were. We had a small fire in
the car and they melted. I'm sorry.
I'll pay cash.
CLERK
We need a major credit card.
NEAL
I don't have one. I'm tired. I'm
angry and I'm begging your mercy on
this Thanksgiving Day.
The Clerk considers the request.
CLERK
Well .••
NEAL
Be a sport. It's free.
CLERK
You can't use room service.
NEAL
I need a toilet, a sink and a bed.
I'm.not hungry.
CLERK
$42.50.
Neal reaches into his pocket. Counts out his money.
NEAL
How about $17?
CLERK
I can't do that.
 96.

NEAL
How about $17 and a promise that
I'll send you a check?
CLERK
I don't own the place,
NEAL
How about $17 and a hell of a nice
watch?
He takes his watch off. The Clerk looks at it.
CLERK
You can't use the phone either.
NEAL
How about a couple feet of toilet
tissue?
CLERK
Sure,
NEAL
Key?
The Clerk turns from the desk and selects a room key. He
gives it to Neal.
NEAL
Thanks. Enjoy the watch. It
probably cost more than you.
DEL
Neal? Do you remember where you got
that money?
NEAL
Yep.
DEL
I gave it to you in St. Joe.
NEAL
Yep. And where did you get it?
DEL
What's that have to do with
anything?
NEAL
Where'd you get it?
 97.

DEL
(ashamed)
I sold your Visa card to a kid at
the bus station.
NEAL
We're even.
He exits the lobby. Del watches him go. The Clerk turns to
Del.
CLERK
You need a room?
DEL
Yeah.
CLERK
Your credit cards burned up?
DEL
I don't carry credit cards.
CLERK
$42 and no room service or phone
calls.
DEL
I don't have $42.
CLERK
You got $17 and a good watch?
DEL
I got two bucks and a Casio.
CLERK
Sorry.
He turns from the counter. He puts Neal's watch to his ear
and sits down. Del looks out the door.

INT. MOTELROOM
Neal's in bed. He exhales loudly. Fluffs his pillow. Sighs.
Shifts positions. Fluffs his pillow again. Exhales again.
Lays still for a moment. Then he sits up. Another sigh. He
gets out of bed and walks to the window. He pulls the curtain
aside and looks out.
 98.

HIS POV
Del's sitting in the burned out Lincoln. snowflakes drift
down across the parking lot.

C.U. NEAL
A moment of compassion. Then a moment of reason.
NEAL
What did I do to get that oaf all
over me?

HIS POV
Del hunkers down in the seat and tries to get comfortable.

INT. ROOM
Neal lets the curtain close. He walks back to the bed and get
sin.

EXT. MOTEL - DEL

He's sitting in the car looking at the motel room. His eyes
shift up to the heavy skies.
DEL
Marie, honey? You were right as
rain. I'm the biggest pain in the
butt that ever came down the pike.
I meet a guy who's company I really
enjoy. And go overboard. Smother
the poor soul. Cause him more
problems than he has a right to.
I'm starting to wonder if I'm ever
going to wake up arid face the music.
He breathes a deep, soulful sigh. The motel door opens. Del
shifts his look to the motel. Neal•s in the doorway.
NEAL
You're gonna freeze to death out
there.

INT. MOTEL ROOM - LATER

Del and Neal are in the bed.
 99.

DEL
You know how few people give a shit
about curtain rings?
NEAL
Who cares about lipstick ads?
DEL
At least you deal with pretty girls.
You know what shower rings are?
NEAL
You know what lipstick is?
DEL
When I'm dead and buried all I'll
count for is a quarter million
shower curtains that haven't fallen
down. That's some legacy, huh?
NEAL
My life's work will fade and be
thrown away. Yours'll last longer
than mine.
DEL
What do you pull down a year?
NEAL
I do okay?
DEL
You know what I claimed as income
last year?
NEAL
That means shit. And second string
player in the NFL makes more in a
week than Van Gogh made in his
lifetime.
DEL
Van Gogh Textiles up in Buffalo?
NEAL
The painter.
DEL
Oh.
NEAL
Money's no measurement of worth.
True worth. Worth to the human
race.
 100.

DEL
I bang all around this country doing
less and less each year. I talk a
blue streak but when it comes right
down to it, I'm running on fumes.
That briefcase I said I got as a
sales award? That was fifteen years
ago.
NEAL
So?
DEL
I've lost half my accounts to a
computer catalogue. Every year half
a dozen customers retire and the
business goes with them. You ever
read "Death of a Salesman?"
NEAL
Sure.
DEL
Boy, do I know where Wily Loman was
coming from. Sometimes I find
myself practically quoting him.
NEAL
He was an older guy. You're young.
DEL
So what? Youth means diddly squat
if you don't have anything to look
to but growing old.
NEAL
At the very lest, at the absolute
minimum, you have a woman you love
to grow old with.

Del doesn't reply.

NEAL
You love her, don't you? Your wife?
DEL
Love isn't a big enough word, buddy.
NEAL
So, there you go. Start with that.
You know how guys in this world have
money and nobody to spend it on?

Del's silent again.

 101.

NEAL
Hey, I'm sorry I popped you in the
gut.
DEL
I deserved it.
NEAL
No, you didn't.
DEL
Sure I did. If I didn't have one
foot in my mouth and the other in a
bucket of shit, I wouldn't recognize
myself.
NEAL
Well, let me just close the
conversation by saying you're one
unique individual.
DEL
Unique? That's Latin for asshole.
NEAL
As much trouble as I've had on this
little journey, I'm sure someday,
I'll look back and have a good
laugh.
DEL
Yeah. Maybe.
NEAL
Goodnight. And keep your hands to
yourself.
DEL
If I hold anything, it'll be my own.
Neal rolls over.
NEAL
You gonna have your smoke?
DEL
No.
NEAL
Quitting?
DEL
They burned up in the car.
 102.

NEAL
Consider quitting, willya?
DEL
My wife used to say that.
NEAL
When did she finally stop?
DEL
(remorseful)
Fifteen years ago March.
NEAL
Good advice. Take it. Night.
A long pause.
DEL
(soft and sad)
Sleep tight.

EXT. MOTEL - MORNING

The snow storm's blown in and left it's white wrath. The
Lincoln's filled to the brim with fresh snow.

INT. MOTEL ROOM

Neal's laying on the bed in his underwear, curled into a ball,
without a pillow or a stitch of covering. Del has both ·
pillows and all the blankets and sheets. Neal wakes with a
shiver. He sits up and looks at Del.
NEAL
Del? Get up. Let's roll.
Neal shivers across to the bathroom and goes inside. Del
stirs and emerges from the sound of blankets. He's wearing
his coat, hat and gloves.

EXT. MOTEL - LATER

Neal and Del are in the car. They've scooped the snow out of
the front seat. The back's still piled high. Neal has the
car in reverse and is gunning the engine. The car's stuck.
Wheels spinning. Nothing happening. Neal lets off the gas.
DEL
We're stuck tighter than two dogs on
their wedding night.
 103.

NEAL
You want to get out and push?
DEL
Sure.
Neal puts the car in park.
NEAL
Forget it. You'll screw up your
back.
He gets out of the car.
DEL
My back's fine. I just didn't feel
like driving last night.
NEAL
I'll push anyway.
Del slides over the springs to the driver's side. Neal goes
around to the front. Del puts the Lincoln in reverse and hits
the gas. Neal pushes with all his soul. Nothing. Del lets
off the gas.
DEL
We better rock it. Get along side.

Neal repositions himself on the passenger side. He grips the

door handle and ~he outside mirror. Del drops the car in
forward and guns it. Neal pulls on the car. Del shifts
quickly to reverse and guns it, Neal pushes. They continue
rocking the car back and forth.
DEL
She's starting to grip! A little
more. Put your balls into it!
NEAL
I am!
DEL
Squeeze your ass and think of Nazis.
We're moving this hunk of shit!
Del throws the car in reverse, it rocks high up on the ice
groove.

DEL
One more and we're home free!

He throws the car in forward and guns it. Rocks a little

more, catches, leaps forward and plows into the motel.
 104.

DEL
Oh, Christ! Wouldn't you know it?
Hop in!
Neal jumps in the car, Del throws it in reverse and plows
backwards, up and over the snowbank and into the lot. He
dumps it in forward and they're off, leaving a hole in the
motel. But no room service charges. Or phone calls.

EXT. HIGHWAY
The charred hulk roars down the highway.

INT. CAR

Del's driving. Neal's shotgun. They're freezing their asses

off. The heater's pumping full blast. They're shouting to
each other over the roar of the wind.
DEL
You ever been to Hawaii?
NEAL
Once.
DEL
Nice?
NEAL
Yeah.
DEL
Marie and I were going there for our
honeymoon. We were all set but I
got the call from American Light and
Fixture. For my job. I not only
blame them for all my career misery,
I blame them for depriving me and
Marie of a honeymoon.
NEAL
You can always go. It's still
there.
DEL
Yeah but it costs more. How you
doing for time?
NEAL
I don't know. I gave up my watch.
 105.

DEL
I feel bad about that. Why don't
you take mine.
NEAL
It's okay.
DEL
No, really, take it. I'd feel much
better.
NEAL
I don't want your watch.
DEL
Not good enough for you?
NEAL
No. Not at all. I just don't feel
right taking your watch.
Del lifts his knees again to steer as he takes his hands off
the wheel to undo his watch.
DEL
Take it or I'll throw it out on the
highway.
NEAL
Just watch the road.
DEL
You're taking the goddamn watch if I
have to shove it down your throat.
He's having trouble getting it off. He glances down. Then at
the road.

NEAL
Watch the road.
DEL
No problem. After last •••
(looks at the watch)
••• night, I'm all eyes and ears.
(looks up)
Give me a hand with this damn thing.
NEAL
I don't want the watch.
DEL
You're making me feel like crap.
You're taking the watch. Here ...
 106.

He holds out his wrist. Neal takes off a glove and starts to
work on the watch.
DEL
There's a funny little clasp thing
underneath. It's a bitch to get
off.
NEAL
My fingers are so numb ••.
DEL
Here, right here.
He takes his other hand off the wheel and points to the clasp.

EXT. HIGHWAY- FURTHERAHEAD

A state police car is parked alongside the road with his radar
gun, clocking motorists. The Lincoln hurtles past.

C.U. COP
He stares at the semi-destroyed vehicle with the top down,
doing ninety two two guys hunched over in the seats. He bits
his siren.

INT. CAR
Neal drops Del's wrist and turns around.
NEAL
Shit! How fast are you going?
Del looks at the speedometer.

HIS POV
The entire dash is melted.

INT. CAR
Del's hunched-over looking at the speedometer.
DEL
It's hard to say, the speedometer's
melted.
NEAL
You better pull over.
 107.

1 EXT. HIGHWAY
The Lincoln rolls to a stop. The cop car pulls up behind it.
The cop gets out and saunters up to the Lincoln. He looks it
over carefully.
COP
Morning.
DEL
Howdy, officer.
NEAL
Hi.

COP
What're you driving here?
DEL
Lincoln Towncar. '86.
The cop looks in the charred backseat.
DEL
We had a small fire last night.
The cop nods.
COP
You know how fast you were going?
DEL
Like I was just telling my friend,
the speedometer melted. It's a
little hard to say with any degree
of accuracy.
COP
.How about 98 miles an hour?
DEL
Sounds fair. Like I said, it's hard
to tell. Although, come to think of
it, it sure was windy.
COP
You consider this vehicle fit for
the highway?
DEL
It doesn't look very pretty but it
moves.
 108.

COP
No inside mirror, no functioning
gauges.
DEL
The radio works.
COP
What're you fellas up to here?
NEAL
We're just trying to get home for
the holidays.
The cop reaches into his back pocket pulls out his ticket
book.
COP
Let me see your license.
Del reaches inside his coat for his wallet.
COP
I can't let you fellas go on ahead
in this vehicle.
NEAL
You can't what?
COP
This vehicle's not fit for the road.
Del hands over his license.
COP
You'll follow me to the station and
the vehicle will be impounded until
such time as it is made fit for
travel on Wisconsin state roads.
DEL
Do you realize it's Thanksgiving?
COP
I got a turkey sandwich in the car,
fella. I'm well aware. You boys
didn't have a little eye-opener this
morning, did you?
Neal's thinking.
DEL
Us? No. Me? I don't drink.
 109.

COP
You in the drug business?
DEL
Shower curtain rings. Drugs?
NEAL
Excuse me. Did I hear you
correctly?
COP
When I see a vehicle of this sort
with a couple sguirrely-looking guys
like you in it, I wouldn't be
serving my citizenry if I didn't ask
a few questions.
NEAL
No. Before. You saJd "Wisconsin
state highways?"

COP
That's what I said.
NEAL
Why?
COP
Because you're on a Wisconsin state
highway.

Neal looks at Del. He's puzzled.

NEAL
We overshot Chicago.
DEL
We did?
COP
(suspiciously)
You fellas don't know where you are?
NEAL
Not exactly. Can you help us out?
COP
You're about six miles outside of
Oconomowoc.

EXT. SMALL TOWN - COURTHOUSE

Del and Neal come out the front doors. Neal's limping a
little.
 110.

DEL
How do you feel?
NEAL
Oh, just great.
DEL
I've never been strip-searched.
Look on the bright side. You were
clean. That's probably why they
didn't bother checking me. Chalk
it up to experience.
NEAL
Why don't you shut-up, Del?
DEL
I'm sorry, pal. I really am. I
don't know how in the hell we got
so lost. I was watching those signs
religiously.
NEAL
I knew I should have driven.
DEL
From now on, I won't touch a car.
NEAL
we don't have a car.
DEL
True. I don't think there's much
point in trying to fix it, either.
It's pretty well shot. You have
insurance, right?
They reach the curb where Del's trunk and suitcases are piled.
NEAL
That's the rental car company's
problem.
DEL
Yeah.
(pause)
Maybe. Maybe not.
NEAL
What do you mean?
DEL
Since I was using your card and I
felt guilty about it, I tried to
save you a few bucks.
 111.

NEAL
Don't say it, Del. For your health
and safety, don't say it.
DEL
I waived the insurance.

INT. COFFEE SHOP

Del's holding an ice cube wrapped in a napkin to his eye.
Neal shuffles over to the booth and sits down.
DEL
You know this is twice in less than
twenty-four hours that you've
slugged me.
NEAL
I just called my wife and you'll be
happy to know she's pissed off and
hung up on me.
DEL
Oh, no.
Del lowers the ice cube to reveal a little shiner.
NEAL
She didn't believe a word I said.
DEL
I'll be happy to confirm anything
you'd like with her.
NEAL
Dinner hits the table right after
the football game.
He looks at a wall clock.
NEAL
Right now, it's eleven fifteen.
DEL
Let's pray for double overtime.
NEAL
I have a house full of family, a
wife that's ready to kill me ••.
DEL
Neal, I'm going to step up to this
challenge.
 112.

NEAL
Please don't.
DEL
No, I am. I'll have you home before
the yams hit the table.
He gets up from the booth.
NEAL
Del, I'm begging you to sit down and
leave the situation alone.
DEL
What can happen? You get home. Or
you don't. Isn't it worth one last
shot?
NEAL
No. Things are bad enough. Leave
it alone.
DEL
Neal, you've hit rock bottom. It
doesn't get much lower than having a
state trooper shine a flashlight up
your can.
He hurries out of the coffee shop. The handful of patrons in
the coffee shop turn and look at Neal. They've all overheard
Del's remark. Neal smiles meekly.
PATRON
So, you met Sergeant Kudner, did
you?
The patrons burst into laughter. Neal shrinks in his seat.
PATRON
He's bent as a willow branch in a
hurricane. Happy Thanksgiving to
you, stranger.
The cafe is rocking with howls of laughter.

EXT. STREET - LATER

Neal's standing on the corner, leaning against a mailbox,
enjoying his misery. He hears the GASP OF AIR BRAKES. He
looks down the street.
 113.

HIS POV
A semi rolls to a stop and Del climbs down from the passenger
side.
DEL
Our ship has come in!

C.U. NEAL
A wary look.

C.U. DEL
He waves Neal on.
DEL
It's free and it's a non-stop!

EXT. HIGHWAY
The semi rolls across the Wisconsin ~ountryside.

INT. TRAILER
Del and Neal are in the trailer surrounded by wooden crates.

DEL .
Beats walking, huh? We'll be in
Chicago in three hours.
(smacks one of
the crates)
Cheese.
NEAL
Yeah.
DEL
Smells, doesn't it?

Neal nods.
DEL
I guess you wouldn't mind if I
slipped off my shoes now, huh?

Neal shakes his head, no.

DEL
Too bad it's so cold.
 114.

A long pause. Neal's not in the mood for a conversation.

DEL
Too bad we don't have a box of
crackers.
Neal stares at Del. He smiles.

EXT. CHICAGO
The truck barrels down the expressway, heading into the city.

EXT. DEPOT
The semi backs into a loading dock.

EXT. TRUCK- BACK DOORS

A hand hits the lock and swings the doors open. Del and Neal
are sitting on Del's trunk.
DEL
We're here!

EXT. LOADINGDOCK
DRIVER
I'm gonna get a cup of coffee, you
jokers start unloading.
He heads down the dock.

INT. TRUCK
Neal looks around slowly at Del. Del smiles.
DEL
Nothing•s free in this world.
You're in the advertising business,
you oughta know that. Right?

C.U. TV SCREEN
A black and white picture of a football game. Third quarter
stats.
 115.

INT. WAREHOUSEOFFICE
The driver and the dock worker are in the office watching the
game. Del and Neal appear in the doorway.
DEL
We're outta here.
DRIVER
Done?
DEL
Yep.
DRIVER
Thanks.
DEL
Thank you.
NEAL
How much time left in the game?
DRIVER
Fourth quarter's just starting.
Del looks at Neal with a smile.
DEL
You win. You can make it.
Neal actually smiles.

EXT. ELEVATED TRAIN PLATFORM

Del and Neal lug the steamer trunk up the stairs. They set it
down. Del reaches into his pocket and removes the last of the
money.
DEL
I'll pop for the token. Where you
headed?
NEAL
Wilmette.
DEL
I'll be right back.
Del shuffles over to the ticket window. Neal tries to
straighten himself up. He brushes off his coat and pats
his hair down.

L-
 116.

EXT. PLATFORM
Del and Neal are on the platform waiting for the trains.
NEAL
I can't say I had a great time but I
can say that after all is said and
done, you did get me home.
DEL
Next time we'll try to go for a
little more comfort and style.
NEAL
I hope there isn't a next time.
A train pulls into the station.
DEL
This is· you.
Neal offers his hand to Del. Del clasps it with both hands.
DEL
You're a hell of a good man, Neal.
I'm sorry for all the trouble I
caused you.
NEAL
It all came out in the wash. Don't
worry about it.
The train pulls to a stop. The doors open.
NEAL
Have a nice holiday.
DEL
You too. Give my best to everybody
you love. Hope someday I can meet
'em.
Neal gives Del a bear hug and runs down the cars to an open
door and disappears inside. Del waves to him.

INT. TRAIN
Neal slides into a seat. He breathes a huge sigh of relief.
NEAL
What a trip •..
He reaches cross the aisle and snares a discarded newspaper
off the seat. He opens it. The train jolts ahead.
 117.

EXT. WILMETTESUBWAYSTATION
A neat little brick building in the sedate suburb. A taxi
pulls away from the front.

INT. STATION
The train pulls in. The doors open. Neal steps off the train
and heads into the station. He's buried in his newspaper,
reading as he walks.

INT. STATION
Neal pushes open the door and walks into the station. He's
stiff reading the paper. He passes the benches and Del
Griffith. Del's sitting on the bench. Neal takes a few
steps and stops. He lowers the paper, thinks and turns.

C.U. DEL
He smiles sheepishly.

C.U. NEAL
He's dumbfounded.

C.U. DEL
Clears his throat.
DEL
Hi.

C.U. NEAL
He's beyond words.

INT. STATION
Del looks away. Neal walks over to him.
NEAL
Del? What are you doing here?
Del looks up at him. He doesn't say anything.
 118.

NEAL
You said you were going to Homewood.
What're you doing here?
DEL
I don't live in Homewood.
NEAL
I'm not getting into this, Del.
I don't know what you're up to but
I'm going home.
Del ·nods. He's serious·and somber. The old enthusiasm and
bullshit has evaporated. Neal heads to the doors. He starts
to exit. Stops. A long beat and he kicks the door.
NEAL
God damn it!
Del jumps from the sudden noise. Neal turns to him.
DEL
Go ahead, Neal. I'm sorry. I
shouldn't be here.
NEAL
You're right, Del. I don't know
what the deal is with you but you
ought to be home. I oughta be home.
I don't understand you, I don't
understand any of this. I've said
goodbye to you ten times in two
days.
DEL
I know. Go on home. I'm fine.
NEAL
Don't give me that shit, Del.
Why don't you go home?
Del looks at the floor.
NEAL
Huh?
Del doesn't answer.
NEAL
What's the matter with you? Why the
hell don't you go home!?
Del looks up at him.
 119.

DEL
I can't.
NEAL
(loud and angry)
What do you mean, you can't?
Why not?
There's a long pause.

C.U. DEL
Serious, dying inside.

C.U. NEAL
Waits for a response. Holds his anger at bay.

C.U. DEL
Looks away, looks back.
DEL
I don't have a home.

C.U. NEAL
The anger fades. To be replaced by confusion.

C. U. DEL
Looks at Neal. Sorry he's burdened him, sorry for everything
he's done. But lost and down and completely out of emotional
options.
DEL
Marie's been dead fifteen years.

C.U. NEAL
Like a knife through his heart.

INT. TRAIN STATION - LATER

Del and Neal are sitting on facing benched. Del's smoking.
 120.

DEL.
She was sick when we got married.
Her bones. She just never got
better. Once she was gone, I sold
the place. I didn't much feel like
being there. My life was empty
enough as it was. The thought of
rambling around the place without
Marie there ••• I just closed it up,
took a few things and I've been on
the road since.
NEAL
The trunk?
Del reaches in his pocket and comes up with a key. He unlocks
the trunk and opens it.

C.U. TRUNK
The remnants of Del's domestic life. A lamp, some sheets,
towels, pictures, a couple pans, fragile things wrapped in
newspaper.

INT. STATION
Neal leans back from the trunk. He closes the lid.
DEL
I didn't have much family. A
brother in Montana, some cousins,
Marie's folks died back-to-back the
year after we married. They were
pretty old. She was a late child.
we didn't have kids. we had plans.
He smiles sadly.
DEL
She wanted three kids. Two boys and
a girl. She couldn't have any,
though. So we didn't a.nd I guess
it's just as well. I number about
300 motels as my home. I sort of
attach myself to people from time to
time. Like with you. Especially
around the holidays. I can take it
in March, July, October. I don't
mind it. But it gets hard about
this time of year. I've never had
much of a chance to be a family man
but it gets really hard. And you
know what it is?
 121.

Neal shakes his head. He's about to cry.

DEL
I don't get to give any of myself to
anybody. It's not the getting I
miss, it's the giving. I sat on
that plane with you and I thought
about you heading home to be with
your people. And Tuesday night when
you were in the shower and I looked
at the picture of your kids, man, I
thought you gotta be the luckiest
man on Earth to go home and put
those little guys on your knee and
hug •em and kiss 'em. I'm thirty-
nine years old and I never had that
and ..• I never will. I'm sorry about
all this. I just kinds lost control
this time. Every year since Marie's
been gone, I've gotten closer and
closer to losing it. Usually, I
head for a church. I can feel like
I'm part of something when I'm in
a church. This time •.• I guess I
didn't get to the church fast
enough. I just couldn't let go.
He looks at his watch.
DEL
I vowed I'd never burden anybody
with this. And I broke my vow, held
you away from your family. Caused
you a hell of a lot of trouble. You
better run.
Neal stares at the floor, devastated by Del's story.
DEL
I •.m gonna head back downtown. He
stands up. I know the firm you work
for. I read your business card.
I've kept a sort of tab on what I
owe you and I'll get it all back to
you. And I just want to say, in
fifteen years on the road, I never
met a nicer guy than you.
He bends over and slaps the lock on the trunk.
DEL
And that comes straight from my
heart. God bless you, buddy. A few
more like you and the planet'd be in
good shape.
 122.

He lifts one end of the trunk and picks up his suitcase and
sample case.
DEL
When I give my thanks, it's gonna be
for meeting you.
He starts to drag the trunk back to the platform. Neal looks
up. Looks at Del.
NEAL
Same here.
Del stops. He looks back at Neal. Gives him a wink and
continues across the station.

EXT. RESIDENTIAL STREET - HOUSE

It's dark, cars are parked up and down both sides of the
street. Lights are burning in a big, old two-story colonial.

INT. HOUSE - FAMILY ROOM

The football game's just ended. Neal's father-in-law, MARTIN,
and his father, HAROLD, are in the family room watching the
TV. A two-year-old girl, MARTI, is on, the floor combing her
My Little Pony's hair. A five-year-old boy, LITTLE NEAL, is
sharing a chair with Martin.
MARTIN
I'm telling you, the Lion's never
fail to disappoint.
HAROLD
They won, for God's sake.
MARTIN
It was a squeaker, Hal. If they win
it's always a squeaker.
LITTLE NEAL
What's a squeaker?
MARTIN
You just watched one.
LITTLE NEAL
I did? And I didn't know it?
 123.

INT. KITCHEN
Neal's wife, SUE, is finishing a relish tray. Her mother,
JOY, is stirring gravy. And her mother-in-law, PEG, is
whipping mashed potatoes with an egg-beater.
SUE
For all I know, Neal could be
splattered all over some highway
somewhere.
Peg shuts off the beater. It's her son.
PEG
Are you just trying to upset me?
JOY
Of course not.
(to Sue)
Last time he called he said what?
SUE
He said he and this Del Griffith
person were in Oconomowoc,
Wisconsin •••
PEG
Martin and I have friends in
Oconomowoc, the Kudners. Their
boy's a state trooper.
SUE
I think he's full of crap. He said
the rental car burned up. He said
he got robbed. He and this Del
Griffith.
JOY
Who's Del Griffith?
SUE
Some guy he met at the airport in
New York.
Sue stops her work.
PEG
The airport was closed, honey. I
don't know how you expect him to get
in when the airport's closed.
SUE
He was with Jerry Lane in New York.
I called Jean Lane this morning.
(MORE)
 124.

SUE (Cont'd)
She said Jerry left New York Tuesday
morning. A day later than Neal,
and he's home, so don't tell me he
couldn't get home!
She undoes her apron and throws it down on the table. She
storms out of the room.

JOY
Oh, boy.
PEG
Neal wouldn't lie to her.
(pause)
Would he?

INT. HOUSE - FOYER

Little Neal's crossing the foyer heading for the dining room.
Sue stomps in from the living room and heads up the stairs.
LITTLE NEAL
When are we going to eat?
SUE
Never!
LITTLE NEAL
Never? Never again?

The grandfathers come into the foyer from the living room.
Joy and Peg come in from the dining room. SETH stumbles up
to Harold and grabs his pant leg. Marti peeks through the
grandpas.
MARTIN
What's the fuss?

JOY
Sue's a little upset.
HAROLD
What's the problem?
MARTI
Because Daddy's not here.
JOY
I'll go have a word with her.
Why don't you all go sit down.
Joy starts for the stairs. The doorbell rings.
 125.

MARTIN
Who the heck's calling at this hour
on Thanksgiving?
Marti bursts through the grandpas and charges to the door.
She grabs the knob with both hands and pulls it open.
MARTI
DADDY!

HER POV
Neal and Del Griffith are standing at the door holding the
trunk.
NEAL
Hi, sweetie!

INT. FOYER
Peg leans up the stairs ·and calls to Sue.
PEG
SUSAN! NEAL'S HOME!

INT. FOYER
Neal and Del lug the trunk into the house and set it down.
Neal closes the door.
NEAL
Did I miss the turkey?
LITTLE NEAL
We're never eating again.
NEAL
What?
MARTIN
What the hell happened to you
fellas?
NEAL
Dad this is Del Griffith.
(to Del)
This is my Dad, Martin Page.
Del shakes Martin's hand. Neal introduces everybody to Del.
Del shakes hands all around.
 126.

NEAL
My mother, Peg, father-in-law,
Harold, mother-in-law, Joy. This
little guy's Neal, Jr., this is my
little gem, Marti, and •••
He picks up Seth.
NEAL
This is my baby boy, Seth.
He kisses Seth.
NEAL
(to Seth)
Can you say, hi?

INT. HOUSE - TOP OF THE STAIRS

Susan's at the top of the stairs, looking down. Her eyes are
darkened with mascara moistened by her tears. She sniffles
and composes herself.

INT. FOYER - NEAL

He looks past Seth to the stairs and sees Susan. He smiles
from rim to rim.
NEAL
Honey? I'd like you to meet a
friend of mine.
Del looks up the stairs. He pushes his·mussed hair back and
smiles humbly.

C.U. SUSAN
She smiles.
SUE
Hello, Mr. Griffith.

INT. FOYER
Neal gives Seth to Del and charges up the stairs. Susan tuns
down and they embrace mid-way. Neal kisses her like never
before.
 127.

INT. DINING ROOM - LATER

The family is seated at the table. Del's at the head of the
table, a huge tom turkey before him. Neal's at the other end
of the table. Kids and grandparents on either side. Susan to
Neal's right. Del and Neal have showered, shaved and changed.
DEL
It's been a long time since I sat
behind a turkey like this.
SUE
It might be a little done.
DEL
I want to thank you all for letting
me be a part of your holiday.
You'll never know how much it means
to me. I've always had alot of
things to be thankful for. But
never more than right now.
NEAL
Same ·here, pal.
SUE
Marti? Do you want to say
something?
Marti looks at her for a moment. Susan nods to her, to help
her remember what she has to say.
MARTI
Oh, yeah.
(thinks)
Heap high the board with ..• What?
SUE
Plentious cheer.
MARTI
With plentious cheer. And gather to
the ..• what?
SUE
Feast.
MARTI
Feast. And •.•
She thinks as hard as she can.
DEL
Toast the sturdy Pilgrim band ..•
 128.

MARTI
Toast the sturdy Pilgrim band ...
MARTI AND DEL
••• whose courage never ceased.
Everybody joins in.
ALL
Give praise to that Almighty
Gracious One ..•

INT. FOYER
We hold on the trunk sitting in the middle of the room as the
voices spill out from the dining room.
ALL
... by whom their steps were led,
And thank unto the harvest's Lord
who sends our daily bread.
LITTLE NEAL
Amen.
DEL
Amen.

FADE DOWN. END TITLE.

THE END