Game of Thrones (TV Series)

Garden of Bones (2012)

Peter Dinklage: Tyrion Lannister

Quotes 

• [at Joffrey's command, Meryn Trant has beaten Sansa and torn her clothes, and he is about to continue beating her. Tyrion intervenes] 

  Tyrion Lannister : What kind of knight beats a helpless girl?

  Meryn Trant : The kind who serves his king, Imp!

  Bronn : Careful now. We don't want to get blood all over your pretty white cloak.

  Tyrion Lannister : Someone get the girl something to cover herself with.

  [Sandor Clegane gives Sansa his cloak] 

  Tyrion Lannister : [to Joffrey]  She's to be your queen! Have you no regard for her honor?

  Joffrey Baratheon : I'm punishing her.

  Tyrion Lannister : For what crimes? She's not fighting her brother's battle, you halfwit.

  Joffrey Baratheon : You can't talk to me like that. The king can do as he likes!

  Tyrion Lannister : The Mad King did as he like. Has your uncle Jaime ever told you what happened to him?

  Meryn Trant : No one threatens his grace in the presence of the Kingsguard!

  Tyrion Lannister : I'm not threatening the king, Ser, I'm educating my nephew.

  [Tyrion speaks to Bronn] 

  Tyrion Lannister : Bronn, the next time the Ser Meryn speaks, kill him.

  [Tyrion turns to Ser Meryn] 

  Tyrion Lannister : THAT was a threat. See the difference?

• Tyrion Lannister : [about Joffrey]  You think dipping his wick will cure what ails him?

  Bronn : There's no cure for being a cunt.

• Tyrion Lannister : I apologize for my nephew's behaviour. Tell me the truth, do you want to end this engagement?

  Sansa Stark : I am loyal to King Joffrey, my one true love.

  Tyrion Lannister : Lady Stark, you may survive us yet.

• Tyrion Lannister : If my sister were so concerned for Pycell, I would've thought she'd come herself. Instead she sends you. What have I to make of that?

  Lancel Lannister : I don't care what you make of it, so long as you release your prisoner immediately.

  Tyrion Lannister : And you received these instructions directly from Cersei?

  Lancel Lannister : As I said several times.

  Tyrion Lannister : And it took you this long to deliver this information?

  Lancel Lannister : When the Queen Regent gives me a command, I carry it out without delay.

  Tyrion Lannister : Cersei must have great trust in you. Allowing you into her chamber during the hour of the wolf.

  Lancel Lannister : The Queen Regent has great many responsibilities. She often works from dusk till dawn.

  Tyrion Lannister : She must be very glad you're helping her from dusk till dawn.

  [Tyrion gets a whiff of a scent on Lancel's person] 

  Tyrion Lannister : Ah, lavender oil, she always loved lavender oil even as a girl.

  Lancel Lannister : I am a knight!

  Tyrion Lannister : An anointed knight, yes. Tell me, did Cersei have you knighted before or after she took you into her bed?

  Tyrion Lannister : What? Nothing to say? No more warnings for me, Ser?

  Lancel Lannister : You will withdraw these filthy accusations...

  Tyrion Lannister : Have you given any thought... to what King Joffrey would have to say when he finds out you've been bedding his mother?

  Lancel Lannister : [sighs in disbelief]  It - it's not my fault.

  Tyrion Lannister : Did she take you... against your will? Can you not defend yourself, knight?

  Lancel Lannister : Your own father, Lord Tywin, when I was named the King's squire, he told me to obey her *in everything.*

  Tyrion Lannister : Did he tell you to fuck her too?

  Lancel Lannister : I only meant I did as I was bid!

  Tyrion Lannister : And hated every moment of it? Is that what you'll have me believe? A high place in court, a knighthood, my sister's legs spreading open for you at night. *Oh, yes,* it must have been *terrible.* Wait here, His Grace would want to hear this.

  Lancel Lannister : Mercy, mercy, My Lord, I beg you!

  Tyrion Lannister : Save it for Joffrey, he loves a good grovel!

  Lancel Lannister : [on his knees]  My Lord, it was your sister's bidding, the Queen. I'll leave the City at once, I swear!