EPHRAIM HARDCASTLE: Why doesn't Keir Starmer just buy former Sinn Fein president Gerry Adams a trampoline?
Keir Starmer is fretting over avoiding paying compensation to former Sinn Fein president Gerry Adams.
Why doesn't he just buy him a trampoline?
Just before King Charles shook hands with Adams in 2015, an aide whispered that if it all became too much HM should just imagine Adams trampolining naked.
Hopping up and down in the garden with his dog was a form of relaxation Adams had admitted to in an interview just weeks earlier.
'The dog loves it. I caught him doing it on his own,' he enthused. Does that explain Charles's enigmatic smile during that encounter in Galway?
Will Prince Andrew be hiding behind the Royal Lodge sofa this Saturday as a Channel 5 documentary entitled Where Did Our Money Go? investigates his friendship with Jeffrey Epstein and his settlement with Virginia Giuffre?
And in a TV double-whammy the channel also airs The Battle For Royal Lodge: Andrew vs Charles, about his thwarting of the King's bid to oust him from his Windsor home.
Keir Starmer is fretting over avoiding paying compensation to former Sinn Fein president Gerry Adams. Why doesn't he just buy him a trampoline?
Just before King Charles shook hands with Adams (pictured) in 2015, an aide whispered that if it all became too much HM should just imagine Adams trampolining naked. Hopping up and down in the garden with his dog was a form of relaxation Adams had admitted to in an interview just weeks earlier
A Channel 5 spokesman said: 'It's been dubbed 'a siege'.'
Sounds like the disgraced royal's life at the moment.
Addressing the Oxford Union, actor Sean Penn fails abysmally to put the Los Angeles wildfires in perspective stating: 'Obviously this fire and firestorm are of historic proportions.
It is very reminiscent of Hiroshima.' Over 140,000 residents of Hiroshima were killed by the Little Boy Atomic bomb in 1945. The death toll in LA stood yesterday at 27.
Kate Winslet has fallen out with the cows near her West Sussex home. 'I go hiking all the time and regularly footpaths will take you through fields of cows,' she says.
'I've decided they're going to stampede me.' Recalling one time when local bovines sped up to a 'borderline gallop' she adds: 'There are quite a lot of stories in England about people having very nasty run-ins with cows.'
Hardly Heavenly Creatures Kate!
Kate Winslet (pictured) has fallen out with the cows near her West Sussex home. 'I go hiking all the time and regularly footpaths will take you through fields of cows,' she says
Marking daughter Victoria Sellers' birthday Britt Ekland announces: 'Sixty years ago today! My Dearest daughter, love you always.'
Cruelly cut out of late father Peter Sellers' will, Victoria says that her father has 'apologised' for disinheriting her.
As it was via a medium did he give her any lottery numbers?
Poet Laureate Simon Armitage gets a rap on the knuckles for telling The New Statesman the countryside should be freer for dogs to roam.
Poet Laureate Simon Armitage (pictured) got a rap on the knuckles for telling The New Statesman the countryside should be freer for dogs to roam
Carol Hughes from Devon counters that dogs attack and kill sheep and their mess causes disease in livestock.
Carol happens to be the widow of former poet laureate Ted Hughes. Poetic justice or dog eat dog?
Delightfully barmy Twin Peaks television series creator David Lynch, who died last week aged 78, was once asked what his 1990 film Wild at Heart was about.
He replied: 'Well, it's about one hour and 45 minutes.'
Christians furious as Trump appoints 'heretic' preacher to lead White House Faith Office
